Numb
by playingthe-blamegame
Summary: Jennifer Jareau never was the girl she looked to be. She had secrets, so many secrets. However, what happens when she and a childhood friend get kidnapped by a delusional serial killer. Do her team find out the truth? Do they not? Or does another member break under the pressure? X-over with NCIS:LA and Grey's Anatomy, but don't need to watch them to understand this.
1. Prologue

**A/N; before you guys go asking, I'm writing this because according to someone, not gonna name and I quote- "Writing what you want to do to yourself is better than picking up the blade and doing it". So, my little inspiration, and I'm gonna be quoting that. Also, I was sitting there, trying to stop myself by thinking 'what if one of my favourite TV characters suffers what I do, what if they're addicted to self-destruction like me?' So, Tadaaa, that's how you came upon this fic.**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own it, never will. Nor do I own the song that this title belongs too; they belong to the respective TV companies and Linkin Park. **

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**15 years previous.**

Dragging the blade across my already scarred skin, I wonder, as I do in times like these; am I so worthless, so unloved, so powerless and numb, that I _**need**_ to drag a blade across my wrists and thighs to feel something. I think; would I be better off dead? Would people care then? Of course not, I'm pathetic. Why would they care if I'm dead?

As I make what must be the fiftieth cut of the night, I start to cry. I find it a relief that I can cry. I thought I was too numb for my emotions to filter through. I was told showing emotions are a weakness, a weakness that everyone will use against you. A weakness that only children show.

But that's just what I am. I'm a child; my parents see me as a teenager, no longer a child. They see me as a fucked up teenager with no future ahead of her. They see me as a failure. They don't see me as a human; no-one does. I don't see me as a human. I see me as a failure. I see me, the fourteen year old girl, who's fat, ugly and stupid. The girl who'll never do anything with her life. The girl whose family has already suffered too much trauma.

Because, in all honesty. I'm just a girl.

I'm just me, and me, is not accepted in today's society, or in futures society. I'll never be accepted.

Little did I know, 15 years later; I, Jennifer Jareau _would_ be accepted in society.

* * *

**A/N: So tell me, did you like, it's only a prologue and it'll earn its rating soon enough, along with probably some mental breakdowns by me;). Review please and let me know if you'd like me to continue.**

**PS: I wasn't so sure about JJ's age in the show, and because this is set 15 years ago, I'm guessing she's 29/30, okay? OK. **


	2. Chapter 1

**AN: Hai guys, here's chapter one. Um, oh yeah, this is set mid-season 2ish, but Gideon isn't in it, so maybe we'll see Will? And updates will be around the shop until about the 29****th**** of this month but I'll still write; just not update and italics are thoughts .**

**velizara95: Thanks for the review. I'm glad you like it, and thanks for calling it unique! I'm not too sure on how the team will find out yet, and I'll apologise ahead of time- if things are too gory or descriptive please tell me and I'll tone it down, I'm just writing this based on my own experiences . **

**CriminalMindsFan: Don't worry, this is the first chapter, the last one was a prologue giving an insight before the whole story starts. And, OK, ****I'll be sure to touch on the eating disorders, but which one would you be more interested in? Let me know please and I'll try to include it **

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"**Everyone is sleeping while she remains awake and leaves reminders on her body of how much she hates herself" Unknown.**

* * *

I'm an accomplished woman, no doubt about it. 15 years ago I would have never thought that I would be working for the FBI, let alone the BAU. Despite the skeletons _still_ hiding in my closet, I work, I sort through cases. We solve cases. We save lives. We put monsters behind bars. If only I could put my monsters behind bars, then my life would be 100 times simpler.

My team; they've all got their fair share of skeletons and demons to face. Hotch; the thought that he might turn out to be just like his father. Morgan, the fact that he was abused by the father figure in his life. Reid, the thought and the knowing that _any _case could cause him to fall back into using dilaudid again. Emily; well she's Emily; god knows what skeletons she hides. And Garcia; sweet, innocent Garcia who uses colour to mask the horrors we see every day. But I'm sure they don't go home after a case and mutilate themselves. A glass of bourbon to drown their sorrows, never anything long lasting. Never anything dangerous. Emily is the only one of my team to know of what I do, and that was not by choice. It was because of sharing a room that she caught me in the act, that case was the worst few days of my life; it was the first time I went over two days without hurting myself. Boy was I glad to be home.

Once again, I find myself in a bathroom of the motel we're staying in. I know cutting on a case is risky; but it's not anything I haven't done before, I've done this for almost every case we've been on every night we've been on it, never being able to stop myself from doing the inevitable. So, holding a blade against my wrist and trying to find the non-existent will to stop, I start to think over the case that we're working on, I take note on the fact that all the victims bear a striking resemblance to me, taking note of their blonde hair and piercing blue eyes.

What struck me most about this case though? Not the fact that any of the victims look like they could be me, even though that did play a part. It's the fact that each girl had scars. Each of them had suffered a different torment through their childhood; just like me. And also like me; each of the girls used the same coping mechanism. Each of the girls had an assortment of scars on their wrists, thighs and stomach, not to mention the odd burn here and there. It was hard to tell what wounds and what forms of torture had been used by the Unsub because of the girls' history with self-harm among other things.

Pressing the blade against my wrist, I felt the edges starting to pinch my skin. Knowing what was coming, I pressed even harder and without moving the blade it pierced my skin like a knife cutting a block of melted butter. The blood trickled out of the tiny wound and I found myself wanting more of it. Wanting more of the crimson red liquid. But most of all; I wanted to be the one to cause it to flow.

Moving the blade I felt it going deep into my skin, so deep and I felt like the cut went on forever. The blood tumbled out in buckets, and I found myself calm. Calm and in utter bliss.

Dragging the blade against my skin over and over it feels like the world has been lifted off my shoulders. Watching the blood fall freely from ten different sized cuts, I find myself transfixed once again. Mesmerised by the sight of my own blood dripping from cuts I caused falling slowly onto the tiled floor beneath me. As soon as the blood eased I realised that didn't satisfy the ache I had inside of me, the _need_ to make more cuts, to make deeper cuts.

Before I know what has happened, I start to feel light-headed and tired. Glancing down at my mutilated wrists and thighs I realise how much damage I caused. '_Hell, that's gonna take a lot of covering up tomorrow'_. Cleaning up all of the blood, it gives me a chance to notice how deep the cuts I made were. All will scar, I know that from my years of experience but some will be more noticeable than others. The cut stretching from the top of my thigh to the top of my knee will scar for sure, and that will be a painful bitch healing considering how deep I went with that one.

After bandaging my new cuts with the last of my bandages, I finally notice the time; 3:54 am. '_God, how long was I in the bathroom for? I got in at 10pm!'_ Realising that there is no point in trying to sleep now, seeing as I have to be up at six anyway. I decide to take a shower and head down to the station earlier than usual.

* * *

Just as I was about to head out to the station, there was a knock on the door. Dropping my things and checking that my sleeves are rolled down, I look through the peep hole; it's Hotch. What's he doing here at 6:30am?

"Hotch, what are you doing here?" I ask him opening the door fully.

"They've found another body, be downstairs in five" He tells me, obviously heading off to tell the others.

Grabbing my jacket I practically run out of my room down to the rest of the team. Seeing Emily leaving her room the same time as me, I ask her if she knows where the new body has been found as calmly as I can without losing it.

"Oh, I don't know" she replies, "We'll just have to see who Hotch sends"

I smile back at her; I know she can tell it's one of my trademark fake smiles because she's seen them so many times. Plus, she's the only one that knows how badly this case is affecting me.

"Hey," She says to me, placing a hand on my shoulder. "You sure you're okay?"

I smile at her, "Yeah, I'm fine" seeing the questioning look she gives me, I elaborate. "I will be fine, it's just this case is getting to me"

"Okay then, just don't do anything that you'll regret" She says to me before walking off to catch up to Morgan.

'_Yeah, I won't do anything stupid'_ the voice inside my head scoffs. Of course I won't do anything stupid when you're around, but I will when you're not around to babysit me.

* * *

Arriving at the crime scene, I immediately start to feel sick. Seeing this poor girls mangled body covered in scars and blood; old and new. I think what if I become a target? I'm the exact same as these girls, we all have problems. And we all take them out on ourselves.

After quickly excusing myself from the crime scene I run to the closest tree and lean against it trying to slow my heavy breathing. Suddenly feeling sick rising up in my throat I turn as fast as I can to throw up. Hearing footsteps behind me, I straighten up quickly, but not quick enough.

"JJ?" Emily asks.

"Yeah"

"Are you sure you're okay?" She asks me grabbing my arm to steady me.

I flinch away from the contact unknowingly, ignoring the look of concern on her face. "Yeah, I'm fine"

"Okay, then why did you flinch away from me? Did you hurt yourself Jayje?"

She looked at me with sad brown eyes and I could feel the tears welling up inside my blue ones. _'Don't cry JJ, don't show weakness' _Looking deeper into her brown eyes I can see the hurt and questions in them. I know either way, she'll get the truth I just can't bring myself to say the words 'Yes, I hurt myself' and see the look of hurt in her eyes. God knows I've seen that look before. Before I know what's happening she's helping me up from my position at the bottom of the tree and walking me towards the SUV where Morgan is waiting. After helping me into the car, she gives me a look that says 'we'll talk later' before turning to Morgan and starting a conversation with him about god knows what.

* * *

Arriving at the motel is a relief; it means I can relieve myself of the troubles of yet another hard day. All I need to do now is make it to my room without breaking down, shouldn't be too hard.

With having the last room on the hall, it means everyone else is in their rooms before me so I didn't think anything of it when I heard all the doors slam shut. But before I could place the key to my door in the lock I hear a thud behind me, turning around with my hand on my gun. I find nothing, thinking nothing of it I turn and place the key in the lock, turning the key I feel someone place something over my nose and my mouth. The last thing I remember before I fade into the welcoming blackness is what will my team think in the morning when they realise I'm gone and find all of my blades, what will Emily tell them? After that final thought; I fall into the pit of darkness.

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**AN: So, what did you think? The first chapter over and done with. Please review and DON'T SHOOT ME FOR LEAVING IT THERE.**


	3. Chapter 2

**AN**: **hehehehehe I'm evil and now this is a crossover. Review responses at the bottom. **

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own it, I did ask for the rights and they just threw elephant poop in my face.**

**WARNING: MENTIONS OF RAPE, BRANDING, CUTTING, KIDNAPPING, BULIMIA and anything else you can find. This fic, not for the light hearted. **

**Oh, and I was wondering, anyone curious enough to help me with torture scenes; because I write them and I start to worry about myself. Seriously. So, message/review if you're interested **

**Just letting you know I had several breakdowns writing this.**

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"**Wrists are for bracelets; not cutting" Kellin Quinn, Sleeping with Sirens. **

* * *

Waking up, I looked around as much as I could with my blurry vision. Not recognising any of my surroundings, the events of last night, started to come back to me. I remembered getting sick at the sight of the latest victim and having to leave the crime scene, then I remember hearing a thud in the hallway of the motel and someone covering my mouth, that's all I can remember until I woke up here. Where is here anyway? What am I doing here? Who bought me here? And the million dollar question- will I make it out of here alive?

Trying to stand, I realise I've been bound to a table. Knowing I won't be able to get out of the restraints no matter how hard I try because I'm bound with the types of restraints that you'd find in a mental institution. Great, that's just what I need. A reminder of _that _place. A reminder of the place that I almost got locked up in when I'm being held hostage.

I try to think about something; anything to distract myself from dark thoughts while I'm here. Thinking; of Emily, of Penelope, of Spencer and of the rest of my team. All the silly things we did on our girls' nights. Of how Spence thinks I don't know about the schoolboy crush he has on me. But it seems that my mind likes dark thoughts too much, because I soon see my thoughts drifting to what will happen when they find my empty room in the morning and how confused they'll be when they realise it's the Unsub that took me. How confused they will be because the Unsub 'strayed' from his usual victims, but then Emily will be sitting there knowing that the Unsub hasn't strayed from his usual victims. How she will be forced to tell the team and I can't imagine the looks of hurt and betrayal that will cover all of their faces; no matter how much they'll try to hide it. I try not to think of how Garcia will be forced to dig through my past, not that she'll find anything, no. I made sure of that. The only thing useful that she'll find in my file is a name; the name of my best friend. Who's equally as troubled; or was, as me. Garcia will most likely contact her, and she won't be shocked, we got into buckets of shit when we were young, and that's the risks we take with the job. Hers and mine.

Knowing who she is and what she does, she'll weasel her way into the case and try to help as much as she can. I wonder if the team will ask her how we know each other so well; they know how guarded and private I am, they'll wonder how I let someone in and told them everything. They'll grill her to the back teeth but she'll –

My thoughts are cut short by a banging noise from upstairs. Quickly filling with fear at the sound of heavy feet making their way down the stairs I started to tug hopelessly on the restraints holding me to the cold surgical table below me. The huge metal door in front of me opens with a forceful bang and in the doorway stands a shadow. No more than 6 feet and 180 pounds; the guy stands short in comparison to the eight foot doorway. Walking slowly towards me, the dim lighting illuminates his face. I'm able to make out a sly smirk making way across his face, presumably at the sight of me, tied down to his table.

He makes his way to the other side of the room behind me, hearing the chink of metal against metal I understand that it must be the table in which his weapons are stored. After a few grunts of frustration from the man and the sound of various items being thrown around. A triumphant sound came from him as he'd most obviously found the torturous weapon he felt like using on me.

As he stalks back across the room towards me, I get a good look at the weapon he is holding. It looks to be, _oh god, _it's a cattle prod.

As he slowly cranked up the voltage, a sly smirk etches across his face as he takes in the look of horror across mine. Walking towards me, he places the prod onto my leg and presses, _hard. _I screamed out in agony as he burned my skin over and over until I no longer had the will to stay awake.

Drifting off into the welcoming darkness, I think about my team and my friends.

I think about her, and how the team will react when they meet her.

I think about Kensi Blye; my best friend.

* * *

***back at the motel***

Emily awoke with a start. She felt that something was wrong; out of place almost. Hearing her phone buzz with a text on the table next to her, she quickly checked the text. It was from Morgan, telling her to get JJ and be downstairs in five. Five minutes? _'I've only just woke up' _she thought. Quickly texting JJ as she ran into the bathroom, she turned on the shower and was out of the door in a record time of four minutes.

Practically running to JJ's room, Emily frantically knocked on the door demanding that JJ come out now. After many failed attempts, she had no choice but to knock down the door that was in her way. Having a bad feeling about what she's find inside, she drew her gun and hastily made her way into the room. After concluding that JJ was in fact, not in the room, she took in the sight that greeted her when she opened the door to the room. JJ's clothes were thrown across the room as if someone were looking for something in a hurry, her phone was lying discarded on the floor by her open go bag and files that were strewn, no longer in order.

She somehow managed to get the out of her back pocket and dialled the number quickly, hoping that Morgan picks up. Emily takes a careful look around JJ's room, making sure not to touch anything; she looks closely at the clothes thrown out of the go bag. Looking closer, Emily sees a hidden compartment in the bag, if filled with clothes the compartment would be invisible and so it would if you weren't looking for anything suspicious. Brushing it off until the rest of the team get here, she's bought back to reality by Morgan's shouts down the phone.

"Emily? Where are you? Are you listening to me? EMILY!" Came Morgan's shouts from down the phone.

"Oh, sorry Morgan. I was just… never mind. Could you guys come up to JJ's room? You need to see something." She said, solemnly.

"JJ's room? Prentiss, what's going on?" At this point, Morgan's words had attracted the attention of the rest of the team.

"Just please Derek, you need to come up here" Emily all but pleaded, and she isn't one to beg.

"Okay Emily, we're coming now" He tells her, looking at the team realising that they understood what was happening. Walking towards the elevators, before hanging up, he heard a faint thank you that was masked by tears.

Arriving up at JJ's room, they see what Emily was so upset about. JJ's clothes were strewn across the room along with files and her phone left abandoned on the floor next to her open go bag. Walking into the room, they heard muffled sobs coming from the bathroom. Walking hesitantly towards to door and opening it, Morgan sees Emily curled up into a ball; crying. Looking up and seeing her team, she dries her eyes and manages to sit up, something she thought she wouldn't be able to do until JJ was found. Looking towards Hotch, she manages to croak out two words. Two words that will undoubtedly confuse and upset the guys of the team.

"She's gone"

* * *

Emptiness. Worthlessness. All those words are repeated to me as he plunges inside me raping me for the fifth time tonight. Whore. That's what's running through my mind as he ties me to the bed and slowly peels away what little clothing I have left. Filthy. As he grabs my hips and enters me with such an un-expected force that I can feel myself tear.

Drifting off into my happy place is the only way to survive this. Letting my mind wander into the place where I never had to self-harm to survive, a life where I was still best friends with Kensi even though she didn't suffer bulimia, and a life where I was married, with kids. And the only problem in my life was if I was going away that day on a case. A life where I was happy. But I know that it's too good to be true as the words my un-named attacker repeats to me start flooding through my mind.

Suddenly, the torture stops, and he pulls out of my painfully. Grasping my chin, he turns my head so that I'm nose to nose with him. Giving me a rough kiss he whispers in my ear, "I'm going to get some rest now Bethany, I suggest you do so too. And then I'll be back later, to have even more fun" He says, tilting his head towards the doors to my right. I gulp; only dreading what torture materials he has locked away. Walking out of the room he turns to me and gives me a smile that will surely haunt me for the rest of my life. Feeling terrified, I lie back down on the bed and sob until I can't any more.

Since I'm chained to the wall, I'm able to take a look at the injuries I sustained during the hours that I was being burned, branded, raped and cut. On top of the many cuts and scars that I had before arrival, it's safe to say that there's not an inch of my body that isn't covered in a bruise or a cut or a burn. I'm able to see the words he branded into me, _'whore' 'cutter'_ and _'pathetic'. _Those are the words that will forever be engraved on my skin, that will forever show how fucked up I am. That will show everyone in my future that I'm beyond saving, and truth is; I am. Mentally anyway, physically the wounds will heal and everyone will go on with daily life but everyone forgets about the mental scars, they always do, and always will.

Through the window in the dark, dank cellar, I can see the sun had risen. That means it must be about 9 am, I wonder if the team have noticed that I was gone yet. Would they think that it's the Unsub? I know Emily will, seeing as I fit the victimology perfectly. But they don't know that.

* * *

***at the station***

"What do you mean she's gone Emily? Where would she go? And why would she leave her room looking like that?" Morgan says harshly, slamming his fist down on the table.

"What I mean Morgan, is that the Unsub took her."

"But why?" Reid pitches in from the corner of the room. "She doesn't fit the victimology. The Unsub goes after women who have a history with depression and self-harm, JJ doesn't. Sure, she looks like the victims and they're her age, but why JJ?"

"Reid's right Emily," Hotch says, his authoritive voice coming to light. "Morgan, get Garcia to run JJ's history, just to be sure that it isn't our Unsub that took JJ"

"On it" was Morgan's reply as he whipped out his phone and dialled Garcia's number.

"Hey baby girl" Morgan greeted Garcia in the usual way.

"My chocolate god, how I have missed you. I thought I wasn't going to be needed if you carried on. Now, what will it be rated R or NC-17." Was Garcia's reply

"Now, baby girl we don't have time for that now. We need you to run something for us."

"What will it be now handsome?"

"We, uh, need you to go through JJ's history, all of it."

"JJ? As in our JJ, as in my kitten?"

"Yeah Garcia, our JJ"

"But, why?"

"We think she's been taken by the Unsub"

"Oh my god. I'll check now, leave me on speaker"

"Will do baby girl"

"So, what've we got so far?" Hotch said from the other side of the table.

"Well he's sadistic, that's for sure. Most likely local, around 6 foot tall, 170-190 pounds, and had a daughter or sister around the age of the victims. Who had a history of depression and self-harm who died, possibly from suicide." Was Reid's answer.

"But where does JJ fit into all of this? Prentiss, you seem quiet, why do you think JJ was taken by the Unsub?" Morgan spoke to Emily, who sat staring out the window, not answering Morgan's question.

"Uh guys?" Garcia spoke from Quantico.

"Yeah Garcia, what have you got?" Hotch asked her.

"Well, uh JJ's history is fishy" she told them.

"What do you mean fishy baby girl?"

"I mean fishy as in, there's nothing in JJ's childhood file other than birth records and a contact number."

"Do you know who the number belongs to Garcia?" Hotch asked, more confused than ever before.

"Uh yeah, one second. Um, it belongs to an Agent Kensi Blye, LA NCIS agent. She's listed as JJ's everything, and likewise."

"You got an address baby girl?"

"Sure have sugar, sent it to your phones now. Just, bring our girl home."

"Will do mama" Morgan said before hanging up the phone

"Reid, stay here with Prentiss, she shouldn't be left alone" Hotch tells Reid, almost out the door.

"Sure thing Hotch"

* * *

Arriving at the address Garcia sent them, Hotch and Morgan walked inside, only to be greeted by a tiny woman.

"Excuse me, but who are you and what are you doing here?" She asked, a scary tone hinting her voice.

"Ma'am, this is Agent Morgan and I'm Agent Hotchner, we're with the FBI Behavioural Analysis Unit, do you have an Agent Kensi Blye working here" Hotch tells the woman.

"Yes I do, and why does it concern you?"

"Ma'am, we just need to speak with her about one of our agents, we think they might know each other" Morgan told the woman.

"Is this about Agent Jareau?"

"Ma'am how do you-" Hotch started but was cut off by the woman.

"Agent, I know things that would blow your mind. And I happen to know Agent Jareau, have done since Agent Blye started working here. They're very close friends, so are the rest of her team, Agent Jareau has known each and every one of the boys since they started; threatened them too. She's a nice woman Agent Jareau, now would you like to speak with Miss Blye?"

Both men stood in shock at the small woman's answer, but Hotch was the first to answer.

"Yes please Ma'am"

"Well, I need to be getting to a meeting so I'll get another of my agents to take you to her. Oh, Mr Deeks, here now"

A man who resembled a surfer more than an agent walked over.

"What's up Hetty?" The man asked.

"I need you to take these two agents to Miss Blye, tell her it's about Agent Jareau"

"Sure thing Hetty, this way" He pointed them through the doorway he just emerged from. Walking into a bull pen, Deeks walked up to who they assumed was Kensi Blye and led her over to them.

"See ya' later Kens" He said walking away, leaving the two agents with Kensi.

"So you're here about JJ, what's she done now? Robbed a bank?" Kensi asked.

"Not exactly, we believe Agent Jareau was kidnapped. But there are missing pieces that we think only you can fill in" Hotch told the woman, seeing her face drop as he continued the sentence.

"K-k-kidnapped?" She asks, in shock.

"Yes agent" Morgan answered.

"One moment please," she said as she turned around and started to walk off, towards her curious team who were watching the exchange from the other side of the bull pen.

She returned a few moments with two guys off her team following her.

"You said JJ had been kidnapped?" The big, burly guy asked.

"Yes, but we need Agent Blye to fill in the blanks." Morgan said to the guys.

"Oh," the other guy said.

"You know we all know, and we could all fill in the blanks" the big guy said again.

"Agent Blye? Is that true?" Hotch asked.

"Well yeah, Sam and G here know, and so do the rest of the team, including Hetty" Kensi kindly explained, worry starting to cover her features.

"Well, would you still mine coming with us. We think another member of our team knows she's just in too much shock to say anything"

"Of course, G, can you tell Hetty where I've gone and can you tell Deeks that I'll be home late"

"Sure thing, now go, find your best friend." G said, pushing her slightly.

* * *

Meanwhile at the station, Emily still sat staring out the window. Wondering if she was blonde with blue eyes would it be her in this position? What was JJ suffering, and when were Hotch and Morgan going to arrive with Agent Blye?

Hearing noises, she looked up to see Hotch and Morgan walks through the door with who assumed to be Agent Blye. She looked around, seeing Garcia on the laptop and sitting down at the table. Looking expectantly towards Hotch and Morgan, waiting for them to ask her questions.

"Agent Blye, how do you know Agent Jareau?"

"Well, I've known her since we were both fourteen, we both had our fair share of… problems and we helped each other through them, sort of anyway. And we've been best friends ever since."

"Problems?" Reid asked, confused.

"Yeah, uh, I was bulimic. And JJ, well she was worse off than me, let's just say that." She looked up, and caught Emily's eye, looking at her she knew that she knew about JJ, but something else registered with Kensi, it was the same look she saw in JJ when she first met her. It's a look she'll never forget. It's a look of someone on the verge of a relapse.

* * *

**A/N:**

**velizara95: Phew good, and i think this chapter is a bit more gory and it is. And i honestly hope you don't kill me for Emily too, because I felt that she needed a connection with JJ, you'll either figure it out or find out soon:D**

**savetoniqht: Thanks for the review! And I am? I'm writing it from what I know and what I feel, thank you, and the ED I decided it would be easier to do it with someone from a different show because I find it really easy to write Kensi. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. **

**Wow, um 3,286 words. You're lucky guys, so make my day happy for once. And review. Because I know that you're reading, just not reviewing, so I'd appreciate if you reviewed. And just to let you know, my personal hell starts on the fifth of September. Yay, back to a place where I want to stab everyone. But I'll still write, and I'll try to update as much as possible.**


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: review responses at the bottom.**

* * *

"**She cuts herself. Never too deep, never enough to die. But enough to feel the pain. Enough to feel the scream inside" Unknown.**

* * *

"_Yeah, uh, I was bulimic. And JJ, well she was worse off than me, let's just say that." She looked up, and caught Emily's eye, looking at her she knew that she knew about JJ, but something else registered with Kensi, it was the same look she saw in JJ when she first met her. It's a look she'll never forget. It's a look of someone on the verge of a relapse._

She couldn't believe what her mind was telling her, someone who knew about JJ, suffered the same thing? And here she is, on the verge of a relapse because someone is kidnapping self-harmers and because JJ was taken by said kidnapper. Looking deeper into Emily's eyes, she saw the struggle that her conscience was having, saw the battle going on that no-one could see. Emily stood up, walking out of the room quickly sending a glance in Kensi's direction that said _'follow me when you can' _knowing that Emily wanted to talk with her, she quickly got the rest of the interview over without giving away what was wrong with JJ, hoping that even though she dropped subtle hints, that no-one on the team guessed.

Walking out of the door at a speed and turning a corner, she was met by Emily, who nodded to an interrogation room opposite her. Following behind and shutting the door, she spared a glance at the equally troubled brunette sitting in one of the chairs. Sitting down in the chair opposite, Emily spoke in a quiet voice that you would not expect from an FBI agent.

"You know about me" she said in a hushed tone, not as a question, but as a statement.

"Yeah" Kensi replied, looking down at her hands.

"How?" She asked me, clearly confused as to how I knew from one look.

"You had the same look in your eyes that Jay did when I met her, only she wasn't recovered and still isn't. Whereas, you, you are recovered, but are on the verge of relapse." Kensi told her, looking her in the eyes.

She let a laugh out, "are you sure you're not a profiler?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'm sure. I'm just a good judge of character"

"Well, how do you know JJ so well? She never lets anyone in" Emily asked, curious as to how JJ would let someone in.

"You know a person well after almost getting locked up together. We ran from the rehab centre we were booked into, we didn't want help"

"Why?"

"Because I had bulimia and depression, I didn't want to be forced to eat and have to sit in a room to stop me throwing it up. And with JJ, being well JJ, we wouldn't have been able to see each other. She would've been put in solitary confinement with guards at her side 24/7"

"She was really that bad?"

"Yeah, she was a mess. We both were"

"Well trust me on this, a rehab centre is better that a psych ward" Emily says, looking down at her hands.

"You were institutionalised?

"Uh huh, for seven months after I tried to commit suicide" She said, looking into the other brunettes eyes.

"Well, uh, how did you make it into the FBI then?" Kensi asked, curious.

"Oh, the advantages to having an ambassador as a mother. She was embarrassed that her only daughter tried to kill herself and completely erased any notes as to what I did so it wouldn't ruin her reputation."

"Oh, have you been clean ever since then?"

"I've slipped up a few times, who doesn't. But, JJ she hasn't stopped. That's how I found out, I walked in on her. Almost made me fall too, seeing all those cuts. But, I stayed strong for her. I had to."

"Does she know?"

"No, you're the only one."

"They'll all find out sooner or later you know. And there's only so much I can do to help, because we both suffered but different things. So you'll need to tell her, she'll need you."

"Thanks Kensi"

"You're welcome Emily, now let's get back before the others notice and send a search party after us. And I don't feel like explaining to my team why that happens"

Emily laughed, and led the way back into the conference room where the rest of the team were going over the information they had with Garcia.

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**A/N: Terribly short, I know, I just wanted to get this out before me and the girls go overboard with the torture, if I put it in this chapter, I think it would end up being about 10k+ words. Please review.**

**Guest: Thank you **

**velizara95: Hope I won't disappoint next chapter. And thank you, always nice someone telling me that.**

**Criminerd: FABBY JANICE IT'S COMING OMG FAB IT'S COMING WE'RE GOING TO DIE IT'S THAT FAB JUST FAB AND FAB AND TORTUREEEEEEE.**


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N: Well, here it is.**

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"**The lines I wear around my wrist are there to prove I exist" Unknown**

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It was cold. So cold. I gave up on trying to figure out where I am but I did figure out one thing; his name. Jason Fleckes. From what he told me during my 'warm-up sessions' as he called them. I knew them names of all of his victims. All of the girls that were just like me, and soon, whether I like it or not, I'll be just like them. A black glossed marble gravestone with my name on it, I'll be dust underneath the ground. And soon, everyone would have forgotten about me. I'll be another unlucky victim of another psychopathic serial killer who was stopped too late.

Hearing the door creak slightly, my senses are on overdrive yet again. Seeing a big black boot push its way through the door, slowly followed by another and then the presence of my worst nightmare. My heart starts beating 100 beats faster than normal and already, just by the sight of him, my mind starts to reel at what horrors he'll deliver to me tonight.

He walks up to me, cups my face in his dirty hands and leans close to me. Placing a kiss to my lips he whispers in my ear.

"Soon Bethany, soon we'll spend more time together. But now, I'll go over that pretty tattoo of yours."

I flinch unknowingly, and a thought occurs to me, I don't have a tattoo. Does this mean he's going to brand me? No, looking around I see that he has no machine to do that, I think, he probably has lots more than what I can see, I just am obviously not allowed to see, _yet. _

I was so preoccupied with these thoughts that I didn't notice him walking towards me; twirling around a knife between his fingers and a sinister smirk spreading across his face until he straddled my waist. I stared up into his deep brown, lustful eyes as he stared into my blue, fear filled orbs.

Laughing devilishly, he lifted my battered t-shirt slowly to reveal an assortment of black and blue bruises, burns in different stages of healing and a deep cut stretching over my abdomen that looks to be getting infected.

He eyes my injuries, the look in his eyes say that it isn't enough nor bad enough. That there should be more; that they should be more painful.

A sharp pain enters me just below my ribs, I look down to see him carving me. He's fucking carving me. What; I don't know, but it hurts all the more. I feel the knife twist inside me in circles, I feel it run so deep into my body you see bone. What feels like an _'I' _is being carved into me, what does that mean? I feel him drag the blade out slowly; excruciatingly slow and plunge it back into me at a different angle. I know the consequences but I can't help the scream that runs through my veins and pierces the silent air. He pulled away from me and stares at me for a moment, before raising his fist and slamming it into the side of my face, sending me crashing down hitting my head against the cold, concrete wall on the way. Before I even touch the bed I feel the blood gushing out of my nose and my head. From a single punch I can tell that he's broken my nose and given me a concussion. I try to keep myself from falling into the welcoming, because I know if I do; the things he'd do to me would be unimaginable, and not knowing. Well, that would be the worst part.

I could see Jason pacing up and down the filthy room. My eyes fluttered as I tried to adjust to the pain on my stomach; I tried to lean forward to see what he had written but the pain was unbearable. He saw me trying to move and a large smirk spread across his filthy face.

"Bethany, you're awake my dearest" he whispered as he moved across to the bed, climbing over me, I whimpered, I knew I couldn't deal with any more pain. Jason cupped my face, pulling me in for a long kiss, believe me I tried to resist, I didn't want to kiss him as he started to trail his fingers and lips down my neck.

"Bethany, sweetie, you like this. Do you remember the first time I did this to you, and I told you not to make a sound, but when you hit an orgasm you were screaming with pleasure" Jason was obviously psychotic I thought as he peppered my body with kisses; pulling my top off, and kissing my breasts through my bra. I knew that something was wrong from the first time he called me Bethany, but I thought maybe he'd got me confused with another victim. I needed to find out who Bethany was. A wife, a girlfriend, a rape victim; the possibilities were endless.

"Jason, how old was I on our first time? I've forgotten the exact age" I asked quietly, hoping this wouldn't cause a bad reaction from him. I didn't want to aggravate him again.

"Oh, Bethany how could you forget, it was your eighth birthday, it was my birthday present to you; your dad gave you a present no other man ever could." Jason said as he took my bra off and starting licking and sucking on my nipples. I thought if I wanted to get out of this alive, I should play along. I knew my team would find me eventually and they'd sort all this out.

"Dad, do we have to do this tonight, I mean, I'm due my period and it won't be as pleasurable for you" I asked trying my best to get out of this horrible situation I had found myself in. Jason started to pull my trousers down, smiling and his erection growing harder as he did so. I could feel it pressing against my thigh. I shuddered, praying that he would stop.

"No, why would I stop, if your period is coming that means I'll only get a few blow jobs a day and none of your sweet, juicy pussy" he said becoming more angry with me. I knew I was going to have to be raped; he wasn't going to let me get out of this alive otherwise. Jason chucked my trousers off the bed and started to pull down my knickers fingering the lace at the top before he ripped them off with such livid passion.

I started to shake and he undid his pants and I realised I was totally naked and he was going to rape me. Jason leant over the top of me, breathing heavily. We were both nude, and his erection was throbbing. I didn't feel sorry for myself at this point, I felt sorry for little young Bethany who had been raped since she was eight, I wondered where she was, how she was doing now and if he was still raping her. My mind had obviously wandered as when I came back to reality, Jason had his head in my vagina licking; his tongue felt rough like sandpaper, it wasn't normal. It wasn't pleasurable, but if it stopped him killing me I didn't care anymore.

He lifted his head up towards mine and started to kiss me, trying to throw his tongue into his mouth. I tried resisting, and this is where it went wrong.

"Why are you struggling Bethany! I told you, I wanted you, I will have you! I was trying to make this pleasurable for you but you know what, no I'm going to make it pleasurable for me" Fleckes shouted at me as he spat on his dirty hands and rubbed it up and down his shaft making it wet because my bundle of nerves was anything but wet. I winced as he entered what was quite a stiff, rigid, extensive, rough and widespread penis into my very tender and uncomfortable vagina.

The pain was unbearable, I screamed, begging him to stop, and that just sped him on even more. He was noticeably turned on by discomfort and agony. His erection got harder inside me, making it more painful. He grabbed my boobs and started biting them and rolling them back and forward with such friction that it was burning. He started shifting his hips so fast that he started groaning.

"Bethany, I'm so close, moan for me girl, make up for earlier, moan or I'll fucking slice your throat!" Jason screamed at me. I attempted to moan, to pretend to orgasm, it was harder than you might think.

"Scream for me Bethany, fucking scream!" Jason muffled into my shoulder as he climaxed. I worked hard and pretended to orgasm shouting "daddy, daddy, oh that is so good daddy" just to make sure he believed I was Bethany; otherwise I'd be dead.

Jason rolled off me and pulled the grubby and grimy covers over the both of us, and attempted to pull me in closer so we could cuddle; afterwards he seemed so caring, kind, he lightly touched my cuts he had made earlier, played with my hair and kissed my neck and forehead. This is when I became more nervous. How was I going to fix this?

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**A/N: heheheheeheheheeh we're evil.**

**SAPagetPrentiss and criminerd are now co-authors and we'll be twisted together. YAY go read their stories, now.**

**LemonFace: Well, here it is. And don't worry this WILL be complete and there WILL be a sequel, we're already planning that.**

**velizara95: Hope we won't disappoint. Here's more!**


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N: because it was easier for me and criminerd agreed with me, anything to do with the team(s) will be in one of their POV's and I'll be sure to tell you who's POV it is We just found it easier like this.**

**I'm just telling you guys' this, it is for definite that there will be a sequel, so for you 800/900 odd readers, can you please review, please. Even if it's just a smiley face, it'll make my day better. **

**Plus, school re-starts on Thursday, and even though I will still write and update thanks to Ellie and Rebecca, I'm doing triple award GSCE science, GCSE History, GCSE French and GCSE Textiles plus mandatory subjects, that's... 16 GCSE's, yep. That will take lots out of me, but I'll try to update this and my other story regularly. Just a fore-warning.**

**Hahahaha this is really ironic.**

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"**Have you ever felt the need to slit your wrist, let all the feelings of guilt and depression bleed out, then sew yourself up again to be happy. " Unknown. **

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***EMILY'S POV* **

My heart is beating hardly against my chest, the blood in my wrist boiling. I forgot what this feeling was like after 15 years of being clean; it's sort of; calming. Calming and exhilarating. A feeling I didn't know I missed until now, a feeling that I welcomed with open arms. In the distance I heard the team discussing the profile of our Unsub, from the tiny snippets I heard, he was Caucasian, approximately 6 foot tall and 180 pounds. Due to the resemblance of our victims, the team assume he had a daughter or someone that was a relation to him that resembled them. The team also figured out that our Unsub was a sexual sadist but that was all I managed to understand because my mind blanked out and next thing I knew Reid was standing in front of my shaking me to get my attention.

"Emily, EMILY" He yells, attracting the attention of everyone in the room, including Kensi, who despite all odds, I am becoming quite close too.

"Wh-what?" I asked, confused as to why I was bought out of my thoughts.

"It's getting late; we're all heading back to the hotel. Are you coming?" He asked politely.

I smiled up at him; this means I'll be alone. This means I can quench the thirst that I feel for my blood. I can stop the boil that has been killing me since JJ went. "Yeah, sure" I answer, hopefully convincing enough that I don't give anything away.

* * *

The car journey and the minutes it took to get up to my room were a blur, sitting on the floor holding my blade I can't even remember leaving the precinct when I think about it. All I can think about is the refreshing cool of the blade pressed against my thigh, the familiar sting of the blade tearing my skin causing the blood to bubble out, to drip down my leg. The familiar feeling of bandages rubbing against the fresh wounds and the pain when standing up too fast. I didn't realise how much I had missed that feeling of being 15 years clean. Thinking about it now, I actually can't believe it has been 15 years. All these years I have wanted to relapse, I never got rid of the lust, the urges were always there. But I always knew that the relapse would be bad, and how would I explain that to the team when all in all I had no valid reason, so I kept repeating the mantra over in my head. Kept staring at the tattoo that adorns my hip, kept tracing my fingers over the many scars covering my body. Kept telling myself to stay strong. But tonight, I don't think I can. If I was blonde it could have easily been me that had been taken, could have easily been me the one getting tortured. I can't stay strong. It's too hard.

I press the blade down, readying myself to cut. Then it happens. Then my door opens. And in walks JJ's other best friend.

I drop the blade and hug my knees to my chest, sobbing. I sob uncontrollably letting all the pain, the angst and the hurt out. Letting out all my anger towards the Unsub, letting out all my feelings towards JJ, and letting out all of my own pain.

Kensi runs forwards and kicks the blade far out of my reach. She bends down beside me and pulls me into a hug, muttering calming words in my ear. She drapes a blanket over me just in time of Hotch's and the rest of the team's unexpected arrival. Garcia stared open mouthed, head resting on Morgan's shoulder tears streaming down her face. Morgan's face was full of sympathy and Reid's full of conflict; Hotch's was stoic as ever, staring towards the two women who lost a best friend.

"Kensi, what happened?" Hotch asked her.

Kensi looked towards me, a questioning look on her face. My eyes answered the question she was asking; do you want me to tell them the full story?

She turned back towards Hotch, "I just heard Emily crying and came in and found her like this"

Hotch started to walk towards me before Morgan stopped him and nodded towards a crying Garcia leaning on his shoulder.

"I'll go in" Reid whispers so quiet that the rest of the team barely heard him.

"Reid, you sure?" Morgan asks.

"Yeah, I'm sure. Just you guys wait downstairs" He asked the team.

Reid walked towards me and Kensi; I looked up towards her and nodded. Signalling for her to go, she hugged me once more and stood up, giving Reid a small smile and walked out.

"Emily, are you okay?" He asked me, gingerly walking towards me and sitting next to me.

"I just- I- I don't know why this is happening to us Reid, first you and Hankel, now JJ and this Unsub, why is this happening to us?" I manage to get out in between sobs, whilst leaning my head onto his shoulder.

"Emily, it'll be okay. We'll find her and she'll be fine" He tells me, placing his arm around my shoulder wearily. But the more I leaned my head into his shoulder; he visibly relaxed and became more comfortable.

"No Reid, she won't be okay. Just like you're not okay- and don't try and say that you're fine because you're not. Trust me in this, she won't be OK and you aren't either."

"How do you know that? What do you mean by trust me in this? Emily, please let me in" He begged me, looking deep into my eyes. I found myself staring back getting lost in his eyes. _Snap out of it, Emily. You can't be falling for your co-worker. Not now anyway. _

"I, uh, I"

"Emily"

"I was kidnapped when I was 14; I was never the same again. It changes you Reid, for the worse."

"Emily, I- uh, I had no idea"

"It's okay, no-one does. You're the only one that knows. My mother had it removed from my records because it would have ruined her reputation. She was embarrassed that her only daughter managed to get kidnapped by a serial killer." At this point, the sobs started again and I buried my head in Reid's shoulder, slowly falling asleep in comforting arms.

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***No-one's POV***

The team and Kensi walked into the conference room to find a manila envelope sitting in the middle of the round table. Hotch walked quickly towards it, searching to see if it had any return address or something that would lead us to _him. _Of course, unspoken; the whole team knew it was from the Unsub. Opening the envelope and tipping it up, a tape and a smaller, thinner envelope fell out. Morgan grabbed the smaller envelope and slowly opened it; his eyes grew wide at the sight that greeted him. He tipped it up and out fell 5 razor blades, soaked in dried blood accompanied by a note.

'_I do hope you're not missing her. She's mine again, always has been always will be. I found these with her when I found her again, you should've taken more care with her.'_

"Hotch-" Morgan started to ask slowly, "are these, are these JJ's?"

"Honestly, Morgan, I don't know" Hotch replied, still staring down at the black tape in his hands.

"Do we- do we have to watch that?" Garcia asked, on the verge of tears.

"Baby girl, if we wanna find her, we're gonna have to" Morgan replied, placing an arm around Garcia's shoulder and pulling her close, allowing her to cry into his shoulder.

"I can't- I can't watch this" Emily said, walking out of the room.

Hotch placed the tape in the player and told Garcia to get her laptop to trace it and hopefully identify the Unsub. For 5 minutes they were staring at a blank screen until the Unsub appeared on the screen, sporting a devilish grin. The team could see JJ in the background, bloody and bruised apparently unconscious; that means she doesn't know. He walks over to her and slaps her so hard around the face, the sound echoes around both room. JJ stirs, sitting up holding her head she looks over to where the Unsub is standing and a panicked look strikes her face. She stutters before finally getting the words out that no-one wants to hear.

"Please, what are you going to do to me?" JJ asks as the Unsub moves slowly towards her. Twisting a sharp knife in his hands. From the angle of the camera, it is obvious JJ doesn't know she is being filmed.

"Oh Bethany" Jason coos, "It's not what I'm going to do to you, it's what you're going to do to yourself. You see Bethany, I heard that you had a little problem. So you're going to please me without me touching you. I want you to cut yourself Bethany. Cut yourself as much as you want, while I stand here and watch you. Go crazy baby."

You could see JJ hesitate at the sight of the knife, but as he came closer to her, you saw the struggle going on in her eyes. She wanted the knife. Quickly, she grabbed the knife off him and moved back towards the wall and without a second thought, bought the knife directly to her wrist.

She struck quickly, pushing the blade down over and over until she appeared to have no room and her arm was covered with deep cuts and blood; she looked up towards the Unsub, and saw him pleasuring himself. The look in her eyes was no longer disgust. It was need. No, not need for the Unsub. Need for the blood. She bought the knife down to her scarred thighs, giving the team full view of the healed scars all over her. There were mixed gasps and cries coming from around the room and Emily ran out once again; Kensi not far behind her as the rest of the team turned their attention back to the screen.

Seeing JJ carve up her thighs, there were deep gashes just made and small scratches that were healing. A scream of pleasure came from the other side of the room, there was movement and the knife was took from JJ's grasp, she looked up towards the Unsub, and the look in her eyes was murderous, she wanted that knife back. She needed the control it gave her. She needed the pain it gave her.

The Unsub started to walk to where the camera was situated and her eyes grew as she realised that what she just did was filmed and most likely streamed live to her team. They just found out her deepest darkest secret.

Leaning forward, tears streamed their way down her face. Leaving clean tracks where they washed away the dirt and blood there previously. She mouthed a message to them through her tears.

"I'm sorry"

The Unsub slapped her round the face quickly before turning towards the camera.

"You come after her, she dies"

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**A/N: watchchachaaaaaaaa. I wanted the fluff between Reid/Emily and I felt that her kidnapping would give more depth, you hearing me? This would've been longer, but I really need to write another chapter of Take Your Breath Away before school starts Wednesday/Thursday, maybe you'll get an update Wednesday morning, because I don't have to go in until half past one, it's so stupid. But please review, I only got one last chapter and I love velizara95 for reviewing every chapter! **

**You may thank us three devil children for supplying you with torture, and don't worry. She isn't going to be found that easily, someone else has to go missing first. Who will it be?**

**Oh yeah, also I'm having JJ in a pairing, so please review on who you want it to be, this is set in season 2, before she meets Will.**

**So it could be Will if you guys want, or it could be an OC. Please tell me :) **


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N: okay, y'all need to go and read SSACalliope-Prentiss 's story MWH Agents, because a) it's awesome and they're secret agents in high school and b) she deserves so many reviews and so far I'm the only person to have reviewed.**

**Oh, this has another co-writer; we're kinda a mini group now.**

**And honestly, a tip, don't watch the Human Centipede 2 while writing torture. So I hand it to the very disturbed writers of that for giving me the idea. But, it's a teeny weeny bit different.**

**Enjoy, wait no; that sounds wrong.**

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"**Sometimes you need to run away to see who will follow you**" **Unknown.**

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The team stood in shock at what they just saw on the screen, Garcia sat typing continuously on her laptop trying to get a location and running facial recognition on the Unsub, with silent tears making their way down her face. Morgan stood in utter shock; not being able to believe at what he saw JJ, supposedly sweet innocent JJ from a small town in Pennsylvania, do to herself, and actually enjoy it. He would try to defend her and say she was forced to, but that look, god that look in her eyes when the Unsub took that knife away from her, that was a look Emily and Kensi knew all too well. And Hotch, even stoic emotionless Hotch stood broken, like he was missing a piece of himself. And Reid, Reid stood, well sat rather crying in the corner at what he just saw his best friend experience, torture he has experienced himself, but not torture on that level. This was a whole new level as to what he had experienced with Hankel. And Emily, she experienced torture herself. Both kinds. The torture she inflicted upon herself and the torture that drove her to it, the torture that happened to her when she was just fourteen years old. And Kensi, she swore to herself to find this bastard and let the guys on him, boy would Sam beat the guy up, he loved JJ as he loved Kensi, as if she were his little sister. And the things Hetty would do to the guy, she wouldn't need to inflict physical pain to mess the guy up, the woman is like a ninja with crazy gun skills.

All of the teams separate thoughts were broken by a squeak coming from behind an array of computer screens and coloured trolls, Hotch spoke up as soon as he registered Garcia's sound.

"What is it Garcia?" He asked, concern masking his already concerned voice.

"Well first thing sir. I found out who he is. Jason Fleckes, ex-navy seal. Father to Bethany Fleckes, who died 9 years ago." Garcia said, her eyes widening.

"Baby girl, how did she die?"

"She, committed suicide at the age of 20, over dose"

"Anything else Garcia?"

"Other than the fact that he's been linked to other rapes and murders throughout Ohio, then no, I haven't. But, I did manage to get a location on this bastard and I'm sending it to your phones right about now" Garcia said, with a click on her keys for emphasis.

"Wait," Kensi said, shocking everyone. "If this guy is an ex-navy seal, then my team could help out, couldn't they. You guys obviously need the extra hands"

The team looked around at each other and nodded to Kensi as she was pulling out her phone, pressing speed dial number two she walked out of the conference room leaving the team standing there, waiting anxiously for her return.

* * *

I can't take anymore. I feel as if my body will break in half, actually it feels like it already has. I'm covered in cuts; self-inflicted and caused by him. I'm covered in bruises and burns. I'm bleeding from the never ending rape, and I'm tired. I just want it all to end. I want my team and most likely Kensi's too, to walk through those steel doors, guns in hands but never to use them, I want Derek, and G, and Sam, my adopted brothers to beat the guy beyond recognition. I wouldn't feel guilty, why would I? I want to be re-united with my best friends; I want to see Garcia's smiling face, to feel Emily's comforting arms around me, and to talk for hours on end about anything and everything with Kensi, to pretend to listen as Reid spouts out random statistics. I want to be free from this nightmare I've been living. Not just the time I've been here, but the nightmare I've been living for 15 years. I want to be clean, to no longer feel the adrenaline rush when I cause myself pain. I want to live.

Jason's near approaching footsteps bring me out of my delusion, he walks towards me, knife in hand and a smile growing across his face. A smile that I've become accustomed to these past few days. A smile that means I'm going to be raped once again.

His erection grows the nearer he comes to me, he sees the terrified look in my eyes as I take note of the other item in his hand. Barbed wire. He drops the knife on the bed next to me and wraps the barbed wire around his fingers, his other hand roams my upper body, pinching and squeezing now and then to make himself even harder, and to make me supposedly turned on when in actual fact, it makes me want to throw up for the next century. His wire wrapped fingers make their way to my core, and he plunges a finger inside me. Not caring about the cuts the wire is giving him, caring about the excruciating pain that he is causing me, caring about the pleasure it's giving him seeing me in pain.

He plunges another finger in as his spare hand makes his way down his trousers, to start the pleasure part of this torture. I cry out in pain as I feel the blood pour out and my insides being teared apart, he misinterprets my scream of pain for one of pleasure and plunges another wire wrapped finger inside me. I can no longer scream; my voice hoarse from the screams of pain I have produced today. Instead I cry, tears pour down my cheeks like a waterfall in the middle of a storm, and I pray to any god that is listening to make this stop. After what seems like hours, Jason grunts and pulls his wire clad fingers roughly out of me, making me cry out even more at the extra pain.

He approaches me and runs his blood covered fingers down the side of my face, smearing it with my own blood and mixing it with fresh tears.

"You enjoyed that didn't you Bethany, I thought you might have been bored of our old activities, so I decided on something new. Tell me Bethany, how much did you enjoy that? From your screams of pleasure and joy I would expect a lot, would you like round two?" Jason asks, the devilish grin spreading across his monstrous face once again.

I try to stop the sobs that escape my throat as I try to answer him, knowing that if I didn't play along and didn't call him daddy there would be even more hell to pay.

"That was good daddy. It hurt though, maybe not so rough next time." I said, looking up into his cold black eyes hoping that was enough to maybe delay whatever he has in store for me, even if it is only for five minutes.

"Maybe not so rough?" I knew I had said the wrong thing as soon as those words left his mouth. "I'll be as rough with you as I want, you're mine. Do you not remember that? Do I need to show you? I think I might have to" The last words were spoken more to himself than they were to me, as he rummaged around in his work desk for more knives.

He walked back over, now carrying three long silver knives in his hand and straddled me before I had time to react. He ran one knife along my chest as he placed the other two with the one he discarded when he walked in.

"Oops." He said sarcastically, as he plunged the knife into my chest repeatedly. "I slipped" His face spread into a wide, devious, dangerous grin. Now was the time I realised I didn't want to die, I wanted to live so that I can see him suffer in prison. So he can rot in hell for what he's done to me, to Kate, to Sophie, to Nicola, to Jenny, to Bethany and to most likely many others.

I started to feel faint as he finished plunging the knife into my chest for the fifteenth time. I closed my eyes for a second and I glimpsed a bright, white light. Am I dying? I thought to myself. I don't want to die.

He stood up off me and kicked me in the stomach for good measure. He walked out of the room, making sure to leave the knives in my possession knowing that I would give into the urges. Locking the door, he sent a parting glance in my direction and walked out of my view.

He left me for dead.

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**A/N: Dun Dun DUNNNNNN.**

**Those people bar Bethany and obviously JJ were the victims that were on the case in LA. Okay, glad we cleared that up. Hope you, uh, wrong word, again.**

**Review please, you'll make me ditch my homework and I'll give you faster updates.**


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N: I'm not even going to begin to tell you where this idea came from, I'm just never going to be able to look at a bottle of coke the same.**

**You Spencer/Emily fans will love me shit loads here.**

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"**My time has come, and so I'm gone. To a better place, far beyond. I love you all as you can see. But it's better now, because I'm free." Unknown.**

* * *

She woke slowly; her eyes fluttering for a moment before she re-adjusted to the small light bulb above her head. She stretched slightly, regretting the decision as she winced at the pain. She forgot all about the fresh cuts spreading up her arms and across her thighs. Though they were the least of her many problems. She looked down, seeing fresh blood still dripping down her legs from the brutal rape she sustained over five hours ago.

She laid her head back against the wall, welcoming the cool it spread over her, though that didn't last long. He walked back in, carrying a cattle prod and a shotgun with him. She gulped; she knew this was going to end badly for only one of them.

* * *

After about an hour of researching using Garcia's computer skills combined with those of Eric and Nell and being distracted by other things, a realisation happened, although I may be able to convince myself that the urges had left me. They truly hadn't. They were still there, and now that I was alone, by compartmentalisation skills did nothing to help me keep the dark thoughts from entering my mind.

We watched the video a number of times; and each time emotion over took me and I was never able to finish watching the video. After experiencing anger, pain and sorrow, here I was standing in the middle of a trashed hotel room, tears streaming down my face. My mind was in overdrive, no-one on the team knew of my mental health issues, they didn't know that I had been kidnapped, other than Spencer; no-one really knew anything about me. They didn't know I was bi-polar. They didn't know that I was a recovered self-harmer. And they certainly didn't know that I got kidnapped that resulted in my abortion at 15.

Feeling the oh so familiar urge for pain that self-mutilation gives me, I start to cry harder than ever before. I have to stay strong, for everyone. I can't break the pact that I took 15 years ago when I got clean at 17. I'm sure by this point I had woken everyone in the hall, but took relief in the fact that it was only Spencer on my hall.

Spotting the half broken vase lying on the floor beside my feet, I bend down and sit next to it. Placing the sharpest shards I could find in my hand, I rolled up my sleeve slowly, stopping it just above the elbow and placing the shard above my deepest running scar, I want to do this, I tell myself. I need the pain it brings me, I need the relief that I haven't felt for 15 years. I press down hard, gripping hard on the glass as I stretch my arm out making sure that if I'm going to do this, it will draw mounds of blood. My hand starts to bleed as I feel the blood slowly bubbling to the surface of the scratch. I dig further in, making sure that I go as deep as I can, not caring about anything around me, not caring if I pass out. Just caring about the blood, and only the blood.

The door swung open abruptly, banging loudly against the wall, alerting me of a presence in the room.

I slowly turn my head to where the sound occurred, seeing a tall figure standing in the doorway. I tried to get a sound out, until I realised my voice had gone from all the crying earlier. Now that I think about it, I'm still crying. I manage to choke out his name before the tears spilled again.

"Reid?" I croaked.

* * *

"- but I feel like I failed her Reid. She trusted me; I was the only one that knew on this team. She trusted me! Do you know how hard it is for people like us to trust people? I'm surprised that she trusted me! It could have been me. If I had blonde hair that could be me that you would be fighting to save. And you would know all of my deepest darkest secrets not even a year into me starting here! I never wanted you to find out. Because I never wanted it to come to this. I was clean for 15 years, 15 years Reid! Soon, you'll know how hard it will be. And don't try to act innocent. I know you're addicted to Dilaudid. I've battled addiction, and it's hard to break. But I can't help but think, what if I had of been there-"

Emily carried on with her rant, as she had been doing for the past 10 minutes. He didn't know how to stop her. He wondered how she knew about his addiction, but after all, she did say that she battled addiction first hand. But maybe a different addiction, he thought to himself. He always knew that he had connections with her. He didn't know how, he just felt something in her. He felt like he could confide in her. He felt like she would know what to do. Then he realised. He was in love with his co-worker. Him, geeky socially awkward, 3 PhD Dr. Spencer Reid, was in love, with smart, beautiful, strong Emily Prentiss.

He knew she would never feel the same way, but still he held onto a glimmer of hope that told him that she did. He held onto that for dear life, as he realised that sooner or later she would realise that he wasn't listening. That's when he made his decision, he was going to shut her up, the only way he could; he was going to kiss her.

Reid walked slowly towards her, cupping her face in his hands as he tilted her face to look his directly in the eyes. He saw something glisten in her eyes, and she leant up and kissed him. It was a slow kiss, full of love. And that's when Spencer knew, she was in love with him too.

* * *

She didn't know what it was; she just knew that when he cupped her face in his hands, she felt something. She felt right. Like she belonged. Like her face was moulded for his hands. That's when she knew, she loved him.

She looked into his eyes as his looked into hers; she was scared that he was judging her for her scars. For whom she is. But he wasn't. The look in his eyes said it all, he didn't care about her past. He knew that she had been kidnapped. And he didn't even care, sure he cared that she had to go through that trauma at such a young age, but if she didn't she wouldn't be the Emily Prentiss he knew today. She was relieved that he wasn't judging her. And by the look in his eyes, she knew what he was going to do, so she did it first. She leant up towards up, having to stand on her tiptoes due to his height. But she didn't care. She was kissing Spencer Reid.

The kiss wasn't rough, it was passionate. Like he was trying to tell her everything, and in return she did the same. Tongues roamed new territory and hands wandered. But nothing went further than that. They both pulled away, in need of air, but kept hands locked around necks and waists and stared into each-other's eyes for a moment before Emily fell to the floor, clutching her arm in pain.

"Em," She avoided his gaze, clutching her arm tightly.

"Em look at me" He said, placing a tender hand on her shoulder. She looked at it for a moment, before looking up and staring him in the eyes.

"I'm sorry" She whispered before breaking down into sobs, clutching him as if her life now depended on it.

* * *

I felt terrible. I swore to myself when I got taken that I would not tell him anything. But I broke, he gave me a knife again. And I craved it. I craved it so much more than I ever have. He tortured me for hours, with a cattle prod and anything else he could get his hands on. He tortured the information out of me; I couldn't keep it in any longer. And now he's going to get her.

He's going to get my best friend.

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**A/N: um…. Review please? And I will seriously love you forever, I have an English essay due tomorrow and I hope that seeing as my English teacher is my form tutor, she'll let me off**


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N: I apologise for the extremely short chapter, I just needed this to be over and done with. Then we can get to the real story.**

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"**It's hard to answer the question 'what's wrong?' when nothing is right" **

* * *

She was walking; she knew it was dangerous to be walking the streets of LA at night, especially the area they were in. She's worked there for years, but she needed to get away. Away from the horror of watching her best friend getting tortured over and over again. The two teams had got a location on Jason Fleckes, but when they arrived. The only things left over were weapons and a small bed covered in blood, her best friends' blood. JJ's blood.

Kensi didn't care what would happen to her, she didn't care who was lurking in the shadows. She just wanted peace. She wanted her best friend to be back with both of her families. She wanted to see the relief on Sam's, and G's and Deeks' and Derek's and everyone else's faces when their sister and best friend was returned to them. Whether she was damaged or not.

She heard a bump coming from a nearby alley, but knowing the area she was in, she passed it off as one of the gangs doing drugs or something stupid like that. She carried on walking, ignoring the throbbing pain in her legs from walking and the pain in her stomach from no food.

She heard it again, turning her head to look down the dimly lit alley she saw a group of people huddled around each other. She looked away from the people as a car drove past her, running it's tyres through a puddle soaking her with muddy rainwater. She looked back again towards the alley, and did a double take when she noticed the people were gone.

She pulled out her gun cautiously, holding it in front of her she made her way down the dark alley until she reached the end, a brick wall. She sighed in relief that nothing was down here. Or so she thought. She heard a loud bang from behind her, she whipped round her senses in overdrive as she felt a cloth being placed over her mouth and a large sweaty hand being placed over her eyes.

She felt the life leaving her, the darkness welcoming her and the last thing she remembered, something she knew would haunt her dreams for years. A menacing laugh that she has heard only once before, coming from a person she despises so hard. She sends prayers out to any god that can hear her, hoping that her team and JJ's will find them both. As she knows, she's now going to suffer the same fate as her best friend.

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**A/N: Told ya it was a short chapter. I played around with this tons, and couldn't figure out a way to do it. And I have gotten lots of ideas that I think are pretty damn good, so I just wanted this out of the way. And c'mon, did you think he was going to be found yet?**


	10. Chapter 9

**A/N: yep, my mental health is currently under observation.**

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"**I guess there comes a point where you just have to stop trying because it hurts too much to hold on anymore."**

* * *

I heard the creaking of the floor boards above me, footsteps moving closer and closer to the steel door standing right in front of me. I could only hope that he hadn't gone after Kensi or Emily, because then I knew I would die fighting. I would get them out of here; I would not let them suffer the torment that I have. He came closer to the door, his menacing eyes level with mine through the bars at the top of the door. I gulped, I knew he had someone with him because normally he keeps his eyes locked with mine, but he glanced down and smiled back up at me. The lock on the door chinked open, and there she was. Kensi. He had gotten her, and it was my entire fault.

She was thrown roughly onto the cold concrete floor by my feet, making her groan in pain. Well, at least I know she's still alive, I thought to myself.

She groaned, stirring slightly, leaning forward I looked at her with big blue eyes, widening in shock as soon as they lay close eyes on her. Her hair was tangled, like it hadn't been brushed or seen a bottle of shampoo for a week. Big purple shadows sat underneath her eyes, masking the tan skin with a pale colour.

"Kensi," I whispered quietly, "Kensi wake up" This earned a groan from the sleeping brunette.

"Kensi, please wake up for me" I said to her, tears once again marking their path down my face, not even bothering to wipe them anymore. As they have become my lifeline, a way of releasing my pain without having access to a knife.

Her eyes fluttered open, adjusting to the dark light in this damp room. She sat up, instantly falling backwards when the movement became too much for her. She looked around slowly, her eyes falling on the broken blonde staring at her with damaged blue eyes.

"J-JJ?" She managed to croak out, her voice breaking from lack of use.

"Kensi, oh my god, Kensi what are you doing here?" The blonde sobbed even harder, her straggly hair falling around her lifeless eyes.

"He took me, when I was walking. He just, took me" The brunette explained, "Where are we?"

"Somewhere in the woods; near a river I think, I remember hearing water. We had to move though Kens, why did we have to move. And… oh my god, the team Kens, what do they think of me now? They saw that tape, I swear I didn't know he did that. I bet they don't even want to know me anymore. Want nothing to do with a self-harmer. Want nothing to do with a damaged girl. I'm useless. I always have been; my father was right. I should have just died along with Jess. I'm hopeless, I'm-"

"JJ stop!" Kensi yelled.

"But, why? It's true" I said to her, in a meek voice. Like the voice I used when she first met me.

"It is not true. What your father said, not true; none of it petite. You have the boys and Nell and Hetty and your team looking for us. And they haven't stopped, not since you left. I think to longest Hotch has slept is two hours, and that was forced. Reid had to slip sleeping pills into his coffee. And Emily, she's a wreck. But she won't stop, she hasn't given up. She's even got some of her mother's contacts working to help us. She won't let you go. And Sam and G, they're hurting Jay, they want their little sister back. They and Derek were fighting over who got to put the first bullet in this son of a bitch, they want you back. They love you, and they want their little sister back." By this point tears were openly streaming down both of their faces, as they grabbed each other and pulled the other into a bone crushing hug, sobbing into the others shoulder.

"Aw, how cute" came a chilly voice from behind them. JJ froze, her eyes darting from hand to hand noting the two bottles in one and the whip that has already caused her so much pain in the other. Kensi froze too, but didn't dare turn around. She just closed her eyes and prayed, prayed to any god that could hear her to let her and JJ get out of this alive. That's when she felt it.

She felt it before she could hear the sound, she felt the leather tear open the flesh on her back, the pain escalating as she was dragged on her back and she felt the wound being tore open more as she was shacked roughly to the wall opposite JJ, staring the blonde right in the eyes. Seeing the tears fill her best friend up once again, she looked away not being able to look the bastard that was blocking her view in the eyes.

She felt the leather of the whip tear her skin open over and over, the blood tumbling down her back and dripping like a water leak onto the floor. It pooling beneath her feet as her pulled her face harshly towards his, to look him straight in the eyes. His eyes darted to his unoccupied hand; she followed his line of vision seeing two bottles of clear liquid. She gulped. She's seen the things this guy has done. She's seen what his past victims have suffered. And she doesn't want to die.

"Right or left?" Jason asks, as if asking the time of day.

"What?" Kensi replies in a blunt manner, earning her a harsh slap around the face, causing her lip to split.

"I said, right bottle, or left bottle. One contains water, the other, well; you'll find that out if you choose that bottle. So I'll say it again, right, or left?"

She thought deeply, not wanting to know but already having an idea of what was in the other bottle. Her decision came rashly; she just hoped that it was the right one.

"Right" She said confidently, her face showing no emotion but her mind and body screaming everything at her in protest.

He bought the right bottle to her lips, tipping a tiny bit onto them, being sure to tip it over the open wound.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" She screamed loudly, knowing as soon as the liquid left the bottle that it was the wrong decision. The vodka battled with the tiny wound on her lip for moments, before the pain on her back intensified to an unbearable level. She felt the alcohol dripping into the open wounds, bringing the pain of them to an even higher level, no matter how much he seemed to pour over her back. It never seemed to be enough, there seemed to be alcohol pouring from the non-existent sprinklers. It was coming out of the walls. It just never seems to end.

Finally though, the vodka stopped pouring. And she was left alone. She passed out once again from sheer exhaustion, wondering if this was only her first day here. She dreaded to think what would happen all the other days.

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**A/N: Um, I HAVE A SURPRISE THAT I HOPE YOU WILL LIKE. If I hit lets say, 25 reviews. Then it will happen next chapter if not, you'll have to wait guys. Trust me, 2 minutes of your time is nothing compared to the time me and my fabbys spent trying to figure this out.**


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N: Yep, good luck with your emotions guys. And I apologise for the length of this.**

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"**I'm tired of trying, sick of crying, I know I've been smiling, but inside I'm dying."**

* * *

The two teams sat solemnly at the round table, the eleven of them staring intently at the black tape in the middle of the table. They had been like this for two hours; no-one moving, no-one speaking, just staring. Staring at the tape that will make or breaks their friends' futures.

Deeks sat in shock, the occasional tear falling down his face, praying for his girlfriend's future. Nell sat crying on Eric's shoulder, his arm around her, she weeping for her best friend. He, comforting his girlfriend. Sam and G sat with anger written all over their faces, most likely planning Jason Fleckes' death in the most brutal way they can think of. The two team leaders sat stoic, looking around at their teams. Garcia sat on the other side of Eric, tears making their presence known on her face, her head buried in the crook of Morgan's neck, whose face was a mirror image of Sam's. Emily sat curled into Reid's side, crying for her lost sister. She may have not have been on the BAU team long, but she was family. Reid was rubbing a comforting arm up and down his girlfriends, their relationship not being hidden from the teams.

Another hour had passed before the first movement in the room took place, a rookie police detective walked in. Not noticing the tension in the room and only intensifying it more. Until Hetty screamed at the guy to get the hell out of the room, he just stood open mouthed at the NCIS and BAU teams. Wondering why they were just sitting around doing nothing. He walked out and Hetty resumed her place again, but this time speaking as she sat down.

"We need to watch this tape" She said, her voice raw with emotion as she said it. Not knowing what to expect, the techs moved towards their computer and the guys moved forward, all but Deeks. He ran out, not being able to see his girlfriend of a year being brutally tortured by the bastard that took her and his sister. The only ones not to move were Emily and Reid; they stayed where they were on the sofa. Emily curled into Reid's side but this time hiding her face into the crook of his neck and his hand covering her ear. Hotch turned on the TV mounted to the wall, not knowing what to expect when the missing family members appeared on the screen.

/

Kensi appeared first, her bloodied and burned back shown in full light. It appeared to the teams that her back had been whipped extensively, and then alcohol poured into the open wounds.

JJ appeared next, and if Kensi's wounds looked bad, then JJ was a walking minefield. Her body was cut up, her face bruised and bloody and various weapon wounds littered her small frame. Her hair was dull, and her eyes lifeless.

And then he appeared, wielding a double barrelled shotgun.

/

The two teams still couldn't believe what had happened to JJ and Kensi, seeing their sister, friend, surrogate daughter, or girlfriend raped with a double barrelled shotgun and told they would be shot if they screamed. Seeing them threatened with one is enough to scar someone for life, but that was mentally damaging. If it was mentally damaging to the people watching, the profilers and Agents couldn't fathom what it would be like to suffer it.

Currently, the teams minus Emily were going over past victims and anything that they had that was to do with Jason Fleckes.

"So," Morgan began, "Why did he take Kensi, the past victims bear no resemblance to her. They're all blonde, all self-harmers and all of them had a sister that had committed suicide. So why Kensi?"

"Maybe he saw her as a liability?" Reid suggested from his place on the sofa.

"Maybe, Garcia, Nell, Eric, have you guys found anything on the footage?" Hotch asked the three techs, who were re-watching the footage to see if they could get anything to get a location on this sick son of a bitch.

"Nothing" All three of the techs replied simultaneously

"Well, keep going guys" Sam replied, placing a hand a Nell's shoulder.

"I think Agent Hotchner that we need to watch this tape again, go over it in more detail" Hetty suggested.

Hotch had to agree with the smaller woman, watching Garcia hit play on the tape they all sat down and watched the tape carefully for details not taking note of the commotion happening outside of the room. That is, until the door flew open and there stood a young girl. With striking blonde hair and piercing blue eyes that widened upon seeing the screen, she stood open mouthed for a moment before finally speaking.

"Is that my mom?"

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**A/N: Told you that you would get your surprise tonight. Hopefully I will get another up tonight. Please review, I'm so close to 30.**


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N: were you shocked then? Oh and I apologise if I get any details about bulimia wrong, I don't know much about it.**

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"**I don't know what I want in life. I don't know what I want right now. All I know is that I'm hurting so much inside that it's eating me, and one day, there won't be any of me left."**

* * *

"_Is that my mom?"_

The teams' heads whipped round, one's a look of relief and joy, and another's a look of pure confusion. The girl couldn't have been older than fourteen, her petite frame giving that away. She looked towards the NCIS team with tears in her eyes, the big blue orbs landing on Sam, she ran towards him and he wrapped his arms around her protectively as she cried into his shoulder. He whispered into her ear and she nodded in agreement to whatever it was that he said.

The BAU team stood confused, not knowing who the young girl was but knowing at the same time. Their suspicions were confirmed as she turned around to look at them, her arm still linked with that of Nell's. She spoke calmly, but the profilers noticed how close she was to breaking point. She looked towards Sam first before speaking.

"Hi, I'm Riley, Riley Madison Jareau"

* * *

I couldn't take it, one day I've been here. 24 hours. And I couldn't take it. JJ has been here five days and has shown no signs of breaking, but me, I can't. He knows all about me, every little detail that I have spent years trying to cover up, and he knows it all. He knows about my bulimia, everyone does. But it's like he is trying to get me to go under again, the constant name calling, the starvation. I can feel it all creeping again, every time he brings JJ food I can feel the sick rising up my throat. My fingers becoming sore, my throat dry. I know then that he has broken me, and forced me to return to my old destructive ways.

* * *

He brings me food, but doesn't bring any for Kensi, I can see her eyes getting wide and her fists clenching by her side and that's when I knew that he had done it. He had broken her. That was always the gesture she made when she wanted to forcefully throw up. I knew it would happen sooner or later, I just hoped that it wouldn't happen. But it has.

My thoughts drift off to what she told me when she got taken, '_You have the boys and Nell and Hetty and your team looking for us. And they haven't stopped, not since you left.' _I wonder, have they actually looked for us non-stop. Sleeping two hours a day; surviving on coffee to save someone who is broken beyond repair. To save someone who had lied to them for years about who she is. Then a light bulb flickers in my head, have they found out about her? Have they found out about my daughter who none of my team know about. Of course Kensi's team know about her, they had to catch the guy who did that to me. I wanted him in jail, of course, but I went ahead and thought while he was being bought in for questioning, what would my life be like if he didn't rape me that winters day when I was just 15 years old. Would I have joined the FBI? Would I be the person I am today? Would I be me at all?

My dark thoughts are once again interrupted as I see him approach Kensi. I swallow the bile in my throat as he forcefully swings her arm over his head and picks her up, throwing her over his shoulder and walking her to the wooden table that I didn't yet notice in the middle of the room. He throws her enthusiastically onto the table, restraining her and tightening the shackles around her ankles.

He reached underneath the table, pulling a vial of clear liquid out of the black box he retrieved. After making sure that the shackles were tight and not able to escape from. He straddled her quickly, hearing her groan in pain as she started to stir once again. She looked up at him with pain filled eyes, asking the un-answerable question.

He smiled in delight, relishing in the fact that one of his captors had broken emotionally. He lifted the vial to the dim light and pulled out the cork excruciatingly slow, before lifting up Kensi's tattered shirt, exposing her whole upper body to him.

He turned the vial slightly, letting a few drops of the unknown liquid to fall down onto Kensi's breasts. She screamed loudly and her body arched from the pain. He laughed loudly, the voice from our nightmares magnifying in the concrete room. He took pleasure in the piercing scream, fully tipping the vial letting the liquid flow freely like a waterfall.

She screamed for what seemed like hours until they slowly turned into sobs. He stood off her slowly, whispering something in her ear that made her whole body tense up in fear. Before unlocking the shackles and throwing her over to the rickety bed that was covered in blood.

He strode over to me, his black eyes glistening with desire and his mouth curled into a sadistic smirk. He picked me up roughly, and as I feel the cuts on my leg re-splitting I scream out in pain. He touches me harshly, forcing his hand into places that aren't wanting to be touched. He throws me onto the table and I finally catch Kensi's eye. I see the pain worn into them. I see the need for her team. I see everything that she is trying to tell me from one look.

He shackles me onto the table, pulling out yet another vial of the still unknown liquid. He doesn't need to pull my shirt up, as I'm not wearing one. Before opening the vial and forcefully throwing it onto my breasts. The ear splitting screams come from my mouth this time; I'm surprised that I can still scream with the amount I have these few days. The screaming goes on for hours and he keeps on pouring what I have now figured out as acid onto my breasts. I scream and scream and scream until the pain finally subsides, only to be rewarded with more as he enters me unexpectedly, I resume my previous activity of screaming. Only to realise-

No-one will hear them.

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**A/N: wow. Um, I scared myself there. I am going to wales tomorrow, so I should get another written by Sunday**


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N: Hi, I felt that Riley's character needed to be explained more. But, I hope next chapter will make up for the long filler. You guys best love me, I ditched my French homework for y'all. **

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"_I'm tired of being what you want me to be_

_Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface_

_I don't know what you're expecting of me_

_Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes" Linkin Park- Numb_

* * *

The BAU team stood in awe at the teenage girl before them. Sure, they had their suspicions as to who she was and how she knew the NCIS team, but they never thought that their suspicions would be confirmed.

Hotch looked around the room at his shocked team, Morgan was just staring, Reid and Prentiss still unmoved from the sofa that they claimed early this morning. Emily still had tears falling down her pale face, her arms wrapped tightly around Reid in a way that shows she is scared he will leave. Reid was in shock too, his face speaking a thousand words. And Garcia a proud look spread over her face, telling the profilers that she had her suspicions this whole time.

Hotch took one last look at his team, before turning towards the NCIS team and the blue-eyed, blonde haired teenage girl now known as JJ's daughter before speaking.

"Someone needs to tell me what the hell is going on. Now"

The NCIS team looked at each other before turning back towards the BAU Unit Chief, each taking a seat at the round table in the middle of the room.

They looked back and forth between each other silently talking to each other with their eyes; Sam looked back towards the small team, opening his mouth to speak before the small blonde beat him to it.

"So," She spoke quietly, looking into Morgan's eyes with piercing blue ones, and exact replica of JJ's. "I suppose you want to know about me. So, ask away with your questions"

"Why did JJ hide you from us?" Reid asked inquisitively from his place on the sofa, "We never even knew she had a daughter"

Riley looked around the table, her eyes landing on her not blood related uncles, and looked into their eyes, looking for permission to continue with the story.

"She uh, she was raped, when she was 15. And well, the rest is sort of history. And here we are, almost 15 years later"

Riley looked for a reaction of disgust from the BAU team, as has happened so many times before, but none came. Instead, looks were exchanged between the exhausted team members, and it was the eccentric tech analyst that spoke this time.

"You know sweetie, I always had suspicions as to why kitten was always so motherly towards us, Reid especially. And I always wondered whether she had a mini her running around somewhere, and now look! Here you are! Granted, it's not the best of circumstances and we would have liked to have met in less dramatic ways but here you are! A mini blondie" Garcia babbled on happily, grabbing the younger girl and pulling her into a bone crushing hug, which, after a few seconds was returned with ease, the smaller blonde relaxing into the touch; happy to be welcomed by her mother's team.

"I do have one question though" Morgan asked, leaning forward in his chair slightly, "Why did your mom not tell us?"

Riley gulped, and looked into the dark agent's eyes before speaking.

"I guess, uh, she didn't want you all to be disappointed in her. I guess she just wanted to be at a place where she was judged before she got to explain" Riley said, a hint of sadness creeping into her already broken voice.

"We wouldn't be disappointed in her. She knows we wouldn't" Emily says quietly, making both teams and Riley look at her, astonished that such a strong woman, could sound so broken.

"I'm sorry, I have to go" She says, standing up, struggling hard to keep in the tears that once again are threatening to spill. Reid quickly follows after, grabbing a coat on the way because of the rain outside.

"Di-did I say something wrong?" Riley asked, hurt and confusion lacing her voice.

"No, no you didn't say anything wrong sweetie. It's just, she's been on edge a lot since JJ was taken, a lot more so now that Kensi is gone too. But she'll be OK, she has our resident genius." Garcia said, quick to comfort the small blonde girl, hugging her tightly.

* * *

"Emily, Emily wait!" Reid shouted, running after Emily who was walking, arms wrapped around her-self, in the pouring rain.

"What Spencer? What?" Emily turned to look at him, her face red, mascara dripping down her pale face, making it hard for Reid to decipher what was caused by rain and what was caused by tears.

"Why did you run out like that? You could've just gone to the hotel, or just left the room. But why did you have to come out in the pouring rain?" Reid asked.

"Because I have to feel something Spencer, you know just as well as I do what it's like to feel numb. To want to inflict pain upon your-self just to feel, granted, different pain and different methods but pain nonetheless. You know what it's like to have urges, to want to cause self-destruction. I can't take it anymore. I thought I was stronger than this. I had 15 years up my sleeve, and I threw it away without a second thought. I want to die, Spencer. I can't take it anymore." Emily exclaimed, tears pouring down her wet face.

"Em, you are stronger than the urges. You made it 15 years. And one tiny cut doesn't make you any weaker than you were last week. You, Emily Elizabeth Prentiss are the strongest woman I have ever met, and I love you for that. OK, you can beat this." Reid said, this time coming closer to Emily, close enough to cup her face in his hands, tilting it up so she can look him in the eye.

"Thank you," She whispered, closing the distance between them and placing her lips against his, the kiss getting passionate quickly. Tongues battling for dominance, neither ready to give up what they claimed as theirs, but the need for air overtook their passion, and they pulled back. Foreheads resting together, Emily spoke, "I love you too." Before closing the distance once again, the kiss once again getting heated fast and before they knew it both sets of hands started to roam the others body and Emily's back hit the wall of the LAPD building.

She pulled away from Reid quickly, leaning up to whisper in his ear. "Take me back to the hotel".

* * *

**A/N: ooooh, cliffy. Well, no, you guys, knowing me will know what happens' next chapter. Cookie to the first person who guesses, AND NO LARISSA. YOU DON'T GET ONE BECAUSE YOU KNOW.**


	14. Chapter 13

**A/N: Please do not kill me, it is my birthday and I would like to live through the day.**

* * *

"I kissed the scars on her skin, I told her she was beautiful, and I don't ever wanna lose my best-friend" Pierce the Veil, A Match into Water.

* * *

It was the vomiting that broke her. The constant reminder of them telling her she was fat, and worthless. The feeling that made her knuckles tingle with excitement. The feeling that made her throat hoarse and dry, but the feeling that still made her want to throw up every little thing inside her stomach.

Some could say that it was that constant rape, or the acid burns. But overall, physically and mentally; she knows what it was. It was Mia creeping up on her once again, the big black shadow growing hourly on her shoulder. The big black shadow that ruined her life aged 14 to 18, the thing that destroyed her teenage life.

And she'd be damned if she let it ruin her again. But she knows that she will.

* * *

Kensi was still asleep, shackled to the wall, arms suspended over her head, legs tied beneath her, head lolling side to side. Her upper body was raw red with acid burns, much like mine was, and still is. It hurts. Anyone who said it doesn't is lying. Everything on my body hurts, I never thought I could ever feel this much pain. And I have felt a lot; too much pain in my life.

A bump came from the next room, then a crash, and then finally the sound of a door slamming in frustration. A string of curses in a language that sounded a lot like Italian came from the room opposite, mixing with the sound of metal touching metal. This made Kensi stir from opposite me, and as I whispered fast demands for her to stay quiet, the door opposite swung open with force, smashing into the concrete wall, making a loud crashing sound as metal hit concrete.

There in the doorway of the room stood the guy from both mine and Kensi's nightmares. Ready to come and cause us yet more pain. And in his hand, a pair of pliers and a shock collar shone brightly in the silvery moonlight that crept its way past the metal bars above my head.

He walked confidently, the second, smaller guy who arrived not long ago following him once again like a puppy. Carrying a video recorder and a tripod with a laptop in his hands, setting them down, he winked at me, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand and bile rise in my dry throat.

The smaller guy set up the video camera and whispered in Jason's ear before walking to the back corner of the room, practically sinking into the darkness. Like a tiger, stalking its prey, ready to pounce in a split second when a moment of vulnerability is uncovered, but the only difference. We are always vulnerable. Me and Kensi, we have never once been safe in our lives. Sure, with our teams we feel safe, but even then we are not with our jobs. Always in the line of fire of dangerous unsubs, or shell-shocked marines but even then we feel safe. It is when we are alone that we are the deadliest, the most dangerous. We are not even safe from ourselves, our own minds torturing us daily with our problems. The demons we have to fight to keep our own minds, to not lose ourselves completely. It's a daily battle. It's a battle we lost before we even started.

* * *

I stirred slowly, realising that I was no longer strung up in restraints as I was last time I had stirred. I was strapped down once again, but this time, for added pain, I had restraints tightened around my upper body. The force of them rubbing against the raw burns there, tearing skin and causing blood to flow freely out of my chest.

I feel a pain against my hand, and I daren't look. I know he is on top of me, I know he is about to unleash another round of torture on my weak body. Never once would I have thought I would admit to myself that, not even as a teenager. But it's the truth. My body is weak.

I scream a piercing scream as I feel a clamp tightened around my ring finger on my left hand. Thoughts run through my head as I ponder what the bastard will do to me next before I feel a sharp shooting pain that makes me scream even louder than before, if that was even possible.

I stare down at my finger, seeing blood pour out of it; I can barely see the nail. _If it's even there_- I think to myself. I look up towards the man of my nightmares, locking my mismatched brown eyes with his steely black gaze, and he raises the pliers towards me, and through all the blood I can barely make out what he is trying to show me; my nail.

I scream even louder then, before turning to look at my best friend. I turn and see her, tears streaming down her face onto her chest, making her cry harder from the pain of the salty tears hitting the burns. Blonde hair turned almost brown from sweat and dirt, blue eyes misted over in pain. I give her the look over, assessing her injuries as she does not so subtly with me. I glance quickly, before my eyes rake back up to her neck which is where the thing lies; a shock collar, and beside her; the second guy; Scott Fleckes, and in his hand; the remote for the shock collar. I stare for what must be seconds, but feels like hours until I feel a keen slap against the side of my face. I stare back up into the eyes of Jason, burning holes into him with my eyes and hoping; just hoping that Deeks will find me.

That's when I spot the video camera at the other side of the room, inching my head slightly so I can look fully into the camera, but not grab Jason or Scott's attention, tears start to stream down my face harder than ever before. Mouthing into the camera I pray to any god that can hear to let my team and JJ's find us.

"I'm so sorry"

* * *

It was all too much for her; seeing her team and Kensi's crumble under the pressure. Seeing her best friend and the woman she considers a friend tortured for hours upon end, but not being able to do anything; seeing the despair and guilt in everyone's eyes. It's too much for her.

So that night, all alone in her hotel room with everyone asleep in their rooms, including Reid.

She allows herself to break.

And god, does she break good.

* * *

**A/N: Good? Bad? Please let me know, and anything you want to happen please let me know, I'll reply to your review ASAP because today it's my birthday and people keep coming and going and tomorrow I'm going to my very first Scarefest at Alton Towers, which is weird that I haven't been before, considering I live 20 minutes away from the place.**

**MUCH LOVE.**


	15. Chapter 14

**A/N: Please, if you need to blame someone, it's my form tutor and my best friend, they gave me ideas. Hence why this is short. Because everyone won't stop nagging me for this, oh and Larissa, told ya it'd get worse. **

* * *

"**Don't hold strong opinions about things you don't understand."**

* * *

The first thing Spencer saw, or more likely smelt when he approached his girl-friend's room was not what he expected. It was not the spicy lavender purple he is used to smelling on her. It was blood. Even outside of the room you could smell it, that metallic copper taste that touched your tongue without even tasting it. The rich smell reached his nostrils, and as soon as the smell did, his long legs quickly carried him the distance to Emily's door in no time. Opening the door, he didn't expect the sight that greeted him.

He walked fully into the room, greeted by a clean room; a room with a bed that hadn't been slept in. He expected to find s horrific sight, things thrown around the room, smashed glass across the floor. That's what he expected to find, not what he did find. There was no evidence anyone had ever been in the room; there was nothing.

He heard the water of the shower, felt the heat radiating from the room. Walking slowly into the en-suite bathroom, he was welcomed by the sight that he thought would greet him upon entry to the room. Emily was sitting in the shower, door wide open, dressed in her pyjamas with smashed glass and rusty razor blades surrounding her. He watched the blood trickle quickly out of her many cuts down her arms and stomach and legs. Watched the tears pour out of her red-rimmed eyes. Watched the tears wash away the remnants of yesterday's mascara stain her pale face.

She looked up, her tired, broken, brown eyes locking with his soft, loving equally as brown one. Taking long strides towards her, stepping over and past everything, blood trail included, he stepped into the shower, not caring that he was fully clothed and would be late meeting Hotch and Morgan.

He gathered his distraught girl-friend in his arms, not noticing, nor caring, about the blood from her legs that seeped into his trousers. He let her sob into his shoulder until the tears ceased, until the shaking and the hiccups stopped. He just held her, and held her while she broke.

Once the sobs fully subsided, Emily looked up into her boy-friend's eyes and looked away in shame. He cupped her chin in his hand, turning her head so that her eyes were locked with his. She tried to look away again, but he wouldn't let her. He wouldn't let her crawl back into her mind, let the compartments and the mental disorder consume her. He wouldn't. But she would.

So he leaned down, still not noticing what lay on the bathroom counter, and still not caring that blood was staining his clothes, he leaned down and pressed his lips to hers, her salty tears leaving a rich taste on his upper lip. She kissed him back, putting all of her emotions into the one kiss. The anger, the sadness, the guilt, yet at the same time; the happiness, the passion, the love.

The kiss lasted for what felt like forever to the both of them, both of them getting wrapped up in the throes of passion before Emily let out a yelp and he drew back quickly, watching her micro-expressions as her brow furrowed in pain and her upper lip curled, to supress the cry that she so desperately wanted to release.

He stared down into her tear filled eyes, noticing how much blood the deep cut that stood boldly on her thigh produced. He looked around quickly, trying to find a towel of some sort before turning off the shower and putting pressure on the re-split wound, trying not to press to hard but trying not to press too lightly, that's when he notices Emily isn't moving anymore.

Not knowing what to do he cleaned up her wounds, luckily most weren't deep; they just produced a lot of blood due to their positioning. He bandages her wounds, and runs out the room to call the person who knows what to do in every situation, Hotch.

Unbeknownst to him, on the bathroom sink lay three shot glasses; containing bleach, one of which was empty.

* * *

**A/N: See, this is why one doesn't tell me to attempt to kill Emily. CURSE YOU SIOBHAN.**


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N: I'm baaaaaaaaaaack, but I'm sorry this may appear short and choppy at times. I'm grieving two fictional characters, and a ships, VERY UNTIMELY DEATH. Also, I've got next chapter written, and hence my grief. It will become a triple way crossover, oops. AND, if anyone has any sense or wants to know what the crossover will be, simply look for the hint in this chapter. But, if you're Larissa you'll know because I was screaming at you about it yesterday.**

* * *

"**A broken mirror, a bleeding fist, a silver blade against a wrist, tears falling down to lips un-kissed, she's not the kind you'll come to miss." Unknown**

* * *

Reid ran out of the bathroom as fast as he can, trying to connect his phone to signal so he could ring for Hotch or at least help. Realising he had no choice but to go to the station, he ran into the bathroom to check that Emily would be fine for at least another five minutes while he got to the station.

Arriving there in a hurry, a hurry in which Reid was sure he broke the law about 50 times, he ran as fast as his lanky legs would take him into the conference room where Hotch, Morgan and Hetty still resided. Panting and out of breath, Reid struggled to get his words out and off of his tongue.

"Reid, are you okay? What's happened?" Hotch asked, concerned about his youngest agent.

"Emily…. blood….. passed out" was all Reid was able to pant out during the panic that was settling on his over-active mind.

"Reid! What do you mean? Blood?" Morgan asked, his concern for his partner rising by the minute.

"I went to her room and there was nothing, and the shower was running, so I walked in to find her still in her pyjamas and covered in blood. There's so much blood, Hotch." Reid said, his head hanging in his hands.

"We need to go" Hotch said, standing up and walking quickly out of the room, heading to the SUV's waiting out front.

* * *

They walked into Emily's hotel room quietly upon hearing a bang coming from the bathroom, Hotch walked in gun drawn as Morgan ran straight to Emily and Hetty rang for an ambulance. Reid sat on her bed, looking out the window as if he was trapped in his own distant world. That's when Hotch noticed the shot glasses on the side, walking over to them under Morgan's watchful eye. Picking up the full glass, he smelt it and held the glass away as he identified the liquid inside it. He looked towards Morgan, and nodded towards Emily who was lying limp in his arms.

"It's bleach" Hotch spoke quietly, looking towards the bleeding, broken brunette in Morgan's arms.

* * *

The BAU and NCIS teams were waiting rather impatiently in the surgical waiting room, surprisingly despite the circumstances, the guys of the two teams became solid friends, and Garcia bonded with her fellow tech nerds.

Garcia, Eric and Nell sat there on their laptops still, tracking anything that can lead them to Jason Fleckes, they had APB's on his cars in every state along the west coast, they had every PD in the coast looking for the guy should he appear in their state. They were doing everything they could to get their best friends back, despite one having the vision of losing her other best friend too.

The whole waiting room was deathly still as they waited for news on Emily; Reid had his head on his hands, silent tears trickling down his face when Garcia jumped up in glee.

A scrub nurse nearby shushed her, and sent a glare her way as Garcia sat back down quietly and looked to everyone else in her vicinity.

"You all need to get on a plane to Seattle, like now. Jason Fleckes has just been spotted with JJ and Kensi at the abandoned Mercy West hospital. Seattle PD are surrounding them" Garcia informed them.

Everyone except Reid stood up, saying their goodbyes as they headed for the airstrip where no doubt the plane was waiting for them to take them to Seattle, to save their friends.

* * *

The teams arrived in Seattle and quickly drove to the nearby abandoned Mercy West hospital. Upon arrival the teams headed towards the Chief of Seattle PD, noting the SWAT team standing behind him; ready and armed.

Hotch, Hetty and the police chief spoke a few words quietly before turning to the two FBI teams and the angsty detectives.

They stormed the hospital, clearing all the rooms on the first through fifth floors before making their way down to the basement which held the morgue quickly and quietly. Hotch, Morgan and Sam turned left, while G and Deeks went right. Making their way down the dark, dusty corridors was hard. But their determination and adrenaline carried them through the task, clearing room by room as they met at the intersection leading to the morgue doors.

They approached stealthily, guns drawn, Hotch looked through the small, circular window and winced immediately. Morgan followed his bosses actions, as did G and Sam and lastly Deeks. Tears sprung at Deeks' eyes as he watched his girlfriend, best friend and partner get raped, next to her lay his little sister, bruised, battered and broken.

Jason turned his head and grinned manically at the Agents gathered outside of the room. He knew he wasn't getting out of this alive, and boy, was he going to make the most of his final moments.

* * *

**A/N: Yay! Please review for me:) Because on average i'm getting two per chapter, and I know for a fact that there are 23 followers to this story and there is such thing as a traffic graph, so I know that people are reading.**


	17. Chapter 16

**A/N: Okay, before y'all scream at me and tell me this was a terrible idea. I need to set something straight. I DON'T CARE. OK? In my opinion, and yes; I am entitled to an opinion, is that Shonda- (I love the woman, but I hate her for killing Slexie) absolutely ruined Lexie and Mark's characters. So, as you know this is an AU fic, and anyone that knows me knows that I don't deal well with people destroying my feelings. And Greys has done just that. It has been forever, and I'm still not over their deaths, okay? So in this, Lexie and Mark never died, and Arizona never lost her leg. So, every shitty thing that killed me that happened in the finale never happened. Plus, everyone that left? So Teddy and Christina, well, they didn't because I love Teddy and thst guy that hired Christina is a grade a fuck weasel. And from now on, any quote that I use at the beginning of a chapter that involves anyone from Grey's will have been said by one of the cast members considering this will become quite heavy, but you don't need to watch Grey's to understand, everything you need to know is at the bottom, but if there is anything else you need to know, PM me or review. This is 5 months post-crash.**

**Okay, now I'm rambling because I'm nervous.**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Grey's Anatomy as they belong to their writer Shonda Rhimes and ABC. However, I do own the things that happen after Lexie and Mark's unnecessary death.**

**Good day, plasmavoric oods. **

* * *

"**I can't think of a single reason why I should be a surgeon, but I can think of a thousand reasons why I should quit. They make it hard on purpose... there are lives in our hands. There comes a moment when it's more than just a game, and you either take that step forward or turn around and walk away. I could quit but here's the thing, I love the playing field." Dr. Meredith Grey**

* * *

Seattle Grace Mercy West hospital was the best out there. No denying it, because it was true. Full of world class surgeons on their specialist field, none of them ever let a surgery beat them, whether it is a tiny human's surgery or an orthopaedic surgery; neurology or plastics. The surgeons of Seattle Grace Mercy West are the best at what they do, they go day to day, completely unfazed by the bizarre injuries that pass through the ER doors. They were affected by every death; it gnawed on one's conscience when a patient died on your table, when a patient died because of your actions. But nothing could have prepared the fourteen doctors standing at the entrance on the helipad for the sight that would greet them when they opened the doors to the helicopters.

* * *

*one hour previous*

Dr's. Teddy Altman and Christina Yang stood in the OR, operating with Arizona Robbins, Alex Karev, Derek Shepard and Lexie Grey when all six pagers went off alerting the doctors to an emergency trauma rolling in, in an hour and to go down to the ER ASAP. Luckily, the surgery was almost done, so within 10 minutes of the doctors receiving the page, the six doctors headed down to the ER. Shocked at the sight of an empty ER, they looked at each other questioningly, before seeing the 8 other doctors waiting for them by the desk.

Walking slowly over, Teddy asked her friend and chief what was going on and he just replied with a stare, glancing towards the rescue radio that was blinking lights, indicating that it was transmitting live.

"What's going o-" Derek started to say before he was cut off by two slaps to the arm, one from Christina and the other from his wife, the second half of the twisted sisters. She shushed him quickly, before turning to the radio, listening with a frown upon her face as the static cleared enough for the doctors to hear what was being said.

"Respond- *static* -this is emergency helicopter 265- *static*- respond" A man's voice rung out around the empty ER.

"Emergency helicopter 265 this is Seattle Grace Mercy West hospital, what's your emergency?" Owen asked.

"Two Caucasian females between 25 and 30, rescued from a basement, both agents for the Bureau. Looks like one was there two weeks, another one week. Badly beaten, not a centimetre on their body- *static*- not covered in blood. *static* Can you take them?"

"Yeah, what injuries do they have?" Owen asked, already grimacing at the image of two women covered in blood.

"Um, from what I can see they've both been raped, brutally. *static* - Starved, cut, branded and many broken bones. And they've both coded once. *static*- I also think one might have brain damage. But that doesn't even begin -*static*- to describe. Friend of them tells me the brunette had bulimia as a teenager, too." The responder replied sadly, the life draining out of him even more.

All the doctors winced internally; never had they had something like this. And hopefully they will never again.

"What's your ETA?" Owen asked.

"10 to 15 minutes"

"We'll be ready" Owen replied. Placing the talkie back into the slot on the transmitter, he looks around at the team of world class surgeons in front of him, realising that 5 months ago, he may have not had them all here.

"Okay, split up guys. Altman, you go with Bailey, Robbins, Sloan, Kepner and Little Grey. Yang, you're with me Webber, Big Grey, Karev and Avery. Torres and Shephard, you bounce between the two. Prepare everything you can, anything, make sure CT's clear, and clear two OR's. We're gonna need it." He said, before turning away to go find some nurses.

* * *

The fourteen doctors were standing on the roof, waiting in anticipation in hopes that they can save the two Agents' lives. Donned in scrubs and gowns, they all looked up as the tell-tale sound of a helicopter approaching reached their ears. Six of them winced at the sound, still not over their fear of flying and aircraft in general.

The helicopter lowered its self to the ground, the doors swinging open just in time for the helicopter to land and the first gurney to roll out. Teddy's 'team' took her, listening intently to the information the paramedic was giving them, and Owen's team took the second gurney, also doing the same.

"Agent Kensi Blye, 29 year old female, beaten and raped repeatedly with a history of bulimia. Coded once on the way here but stabilised since." The paramedic told Meredith as she took the chart of him, looking towards her sister and giving her a nod of reassurance.

* * *

Lexie listened closely to the paramedic, as he handed her the chart.

"Agent Jennifer Jareau or JJ as the friend told me to call her, 29 year old female, beaten and raped with foreign objects, looks like barbed wire to me. Coded on the way here but stabilised"

Lexie looked down at the chart, reading in the information as fast as her eyes would allow her before passing the chart to Callie for her to keep.

The elevator seemed to take forever to get down to the ER; in the meantime, everyone was staring at the broken blonde before their eyes. Wondering where they had all seen her face and name before. It's silent for a moment before April clicks her fingers together in victory.

"The TV" She said triumphantly, earning her looks of confusion from her co-workers. "The TV, she was the FBI agent that was kidnapped by that serial killer in LA, it was everywhere. Because they found the guys car here"

"Poor girl," Callie sighed sadly, "The things she must have gone through"

The whole elevator went silent for a few moments, until the unmistakeably ding announcing that they had reached the ER sounded. They got out fast, so that it could be sent up again for the other girl.

They had just entered trauma room 1 as alarms sounded, forcing the team into hyper-alert mode. Callie tore open JJ's shirt as a nearby nurse pulled over the crash cart, eyes popping wide open as she took in the injuries that were still pumping blood like there was no tomorrow, the burns that covered her body, the scars; old and new, and most of all, the incision that spread from the blondes left collarbone to the right side of her waist.

Teddy leant closer to the open wound on the Agents chest before asking for a scalpel and rib spreaders to crack JJ's chest. As she did that, Lexie and Mark assessed the burns spreading the battered woman's body while Callie checked over the blondes bones, the blonde who reminds her so much of the woman standing just in front of her, her wife, the love of her life and wondered if the blonde on the table had any family back home, if she had a boyfriend or girlfriend, wife or husband, or a son or a daughter. April, Arizona and Bailey were checking over the woman for general injuries and were just about to send April to fetch Derek about a head wound as he ran into the room, almost knocking April over in the process.

"You need any help in here?" He asked.

"But what about the other girl?" Arizona asked; her aquamarine eyes shining brightly as she looked at her daughter's father's best friend in the eyes.

"She's being taken up to surgery, cardiac tamponade, Christina's performing a pericardiocentesis in OR two, and told me to come to tell Callie that she needs you up there to reset all of her leg bones, her leg's infected so it doesn't look good." Derek says, turning toward Callie as he says those last words, knowing how much pain the same thing caused them five months ago.

"Okay, are you guys okay here without me? I'll schedule the bone reset for tomorrow" Callie said as she left the room in a hurry after she received a round of nods.

* * *

As Callie approached OR 2, the hallway was deadly silent. Not like Seattle Grace Mercy West at all, it's like everyone knew that this was happening, like they had purposely stayed away for today just because of the two traumas.

Callie entered the OR, to see Christina removing the chest tube she had placed there to remove the blood, just as she pulled the remainder of the chest tube out alarms sounded. And the only thing Callie could make out under all the rush was the two words that still to this day affected her.

"She's crashing"

* * *

**A/N: That was sooooooooooo long, and I just felt that for people who don't watch Grey's and were curious as to why 6 doctors were operating together. Here are the doctors and their specialities;**

Cardio Thoracic (Heart): Teddy Altman and Christina Yang

General: Miranda Bailey, Richard Webber and Meredith Grey

Paediatrics: Arizona Robbins and Alex Karev

Neurology (Brain): Derek Shepard

Plastics: Mark Sloan, Jackson Avery and Lexie Grey

Trauma: Owen Hunt (Chief of Surgery) and April Kepner

Orthopaedics (Bones): Callie Torres

PS: The twisted sisters and Meredith and Christina.

PPS: **I apologise if I have confused anyone, I just found it easier to write the hospital scenes, and there will be a lot, if it was to do with something I knew a lot about. And it was easier than having to make up new characters.**

PPPS: For anyone who didn't know, Lexie is Reid's counterpart in Grey's. With her having a photographic memory, so for anyone who watches Grey's, keep an eye out for her nickname.

PPPPS: **PLEASE REVIEW, PLEASE PLEASE. I don't like to beg but I would like to know your opinions on the chapters. Because so far the only reviewers every chapter are velizara95 and Larissa( but only because I beg her to) **


	18. Chapter 17

**A/N: Sorry if the next few chapters are fairly heavy on the Grey's Anatomy things. I felt that, considering all of the remaining chapters of this fic and some of the sequel will be spent at Seattle Grace Mercy West hospital, that things: background stories, pairings, the plane crash etc. should be explained. And you should know, despite this being set in season 9 of GA, some will and some will not follow canon. Also, I was really happy last chapter with the reviews, because a) that was the most I've gotten on a chapter in this fic and b) please do it again this chapter, it made me happy. **

* * *

"**Sad is mine, find your own emotion."- Dr. Christina Yang.**

* * *

Callie sped into hyper-action as soon as she heard those words leave the scrub nurses' mouth, she ran quickly to Christina's side, watching closely as she cracked open the blood caked woman's chest and placed rib spreaders inside of her. She stood helplessly as Christina placed the paddles inside the woman's chest, charging to 200, 300, and 350. She watched the monitors closely, willing the woman's stats to rise, for a tiny flicker of a green line to appear on the screen and let out a sigh of relief when the monitor displayed the lines going up and down, when the screens displayed the numbers slowly climbing upwards. Sighing, she locked eyes with the exhausted doctor in front of her, the doctor that has had no more than an hours sleep in the past 48 hours.

Christina looked directly at Callie while she spoke, "Cardiac Tamponade is clear. Page me if she codes again, if not, she's all yours." The younger attending said whilst walking out of the OR.

Calliope Torres took her place at the bottom of the table assessing the damage to the broken woman's equally as broken legs, looking up she looked around the room solemnly before grabbing a nearby twirling stool and sitting down on it.

Cracking her fingers, she prepares herself for a surgery that will most likely take her to the end of the day.

"Scalpel" She says, before retrieving the item and going to work creating magic.

* * *

Riley stood in the ICU corridor, looking into her Mum's room watching the steady rise and fall of her intubated chest, watching her Mum in general as she lies, as pale as the hospital sheets surrounding her too thin body, her dirty blonde hair strewn behind her head carelessly. Overall, to an outsider, Jennifer Jareau would look like someone living on the streets who'd taken an overdose, but to the 15 year old girl standing on the other side of the glass door and the two broken teams sitting out in the waiting room she was the complete opposite. She was a mother, a friend, a colleague and a sister.

Riley was thinking that hard, mentally willing her mother to wake up and be okay, to wake up and gather the smaller blonde in her arms and tell her that it's all okay that she didn't hear the soft sound of footsteps approach her and stop directly beside her until she heard the distinct sound of a throat clearing.

She looked to her left, her blue eyes meeting with the browns of the Latina doctor who reset her aunt's leg bones not an hour ago.

"She'll wake up you know, your Mum. She will" The Latina looked down at the petite blonde beside her, taking in how exhausted she actually was.

"How do you know though?" Callie almost broke down at how vulnerable the teenager's voice sounded. "How do you know she'll wake up, you can say that but she'll wake up with a million times more problems than before, so how do you know she'll wake up?" The blonde asked; her voice thick with unshed as she looked down at floor, trying to keep the onslaught of tears at bay.

"Look," The Latina turned the blonde to look her in the eyes before leading her to the nearby chairs. "I'm not saying she won't wake up without problems, because she will, but she will wake up. I know what you're feeling right now, and I know that you probably just want your Mum to wake up so she can hold you and tell you everything is okay. I know okay, I was in the same place not five months ago, with the person I loved lying in that very bed. And I just wanted her to wake up and be perfectly fine, but she wasn't. But what I can tell you; is that she will wake up. You just have to be patient" Callie said, never once breaking eye contact with the blonde teenager in front of her.

"Thank you" Riley whispered; the words barely audible above the noise of day to day hospital business and gossip.

"Anytime," The Latina doctor told her sincerely, "I just felt you needed to hear the truth for once" she said, standing up to leave before a tug on her sleeve stopped her in her tracks to walk away.

"Don't go, please," The blonde begged her, "You're the only one to tell me the truth" She looked up at her with pleading blue eyes that reminded her of Arizona's, she knew at that time that she couldn't leave.

"Okay, but on one condition you don't call me doctor. You call me Callie" Callie told Riley, sinking down into the chair once again.

A smile broke across Riley's exhausted face. "Deal"

* * *

It was a flurry of movement in Kensi's ICU room, with various doctors doing various things; Meredith Grey found it hard to concentrate on what she was doing.

"What the-" She exclaimed whilst giving a second, harder look at the ultrasound screen before her. "Alex, get over here and tell me what this looks like" She says whilst Alex makes his way over to the ultrasound screen, looking closely as Meredith points towards the two bright blobs on the screen in front of her.

"That looks like twin babies, Dr. Grey" Alex says as a matter of factly.

"Yeah, that's what I thought" Meredith says just as Kensi crashes just as one of the babies goes into distress.

"Someone page the Chief and tell him to get Dr. Addison Montgomery here, NOW"

* * *

**A/N: I beg of you all to review again. And you should know there are not many chapters left of this story, but the ending me and Larissa have got is a cracker**** so please review, because (hopefully) we're going to start another chapter today! And just so everyone is clear, in this Owen Hunt is not chief, not that I have anything against him, it's just for the sake of this story that Richard Webber resumes his place as Chief of Surgery, it's for the better good.**


	19. Chapter 18

**A/N: Yes, I am well aware that Addison has a child in Private Practice, but once again for all intents and purposes, Henry doesn't exist in this story. And yes, he is called Henry before anyone says that I made it up, Google it if you don't believe me. Also, I wanted this to be up days ago, BUT, my teachers think that because I have an IQ of 127 that I want to do all their work for them. And yes that is true; we all got tested at school. Just to clear things up, a list of pairings will be included at the end of this chapter. Because this story has far too many too keep up with. **

**Nope, not gonna apologise for the pairing in this, NOT. AT. ALL.**

**Because I have three words for you about them, THEY KILL ME.**

* * *

"**Alone people don't like to hear about together people, OK, even if the alone people are alone by choice, it's sort of mean, it's sort of like bringing a six pack to an AA meeting"- Dr. Calliope Torres.**

* * *

Addison Forbes Montgomery stood outside of Seattle Presbyterian Hospital staring up at the tall building wondering what drew her back to Seattle of all places; she was happy in LA, at the practice, right? But what was it that drew her back to the city where her marriage crumbled for the second time, where she watched her ex-husband go off with another woman. Why did she want to be back here? The place where everything seemingly went wrong, what was it that made her pick up that phone and ask if there were any spots open for her to work there? Was it the fact that New York or Los Angeles never felt like home? Was Seattle always home? And she just didn't know it until it was too late to return?

Her thoughts carried off into what seemed like forever and she didn't realise that it had once again started to rain until her phone rang, bringing her back to her full senses as she retrieved the ringing item from her coat pocket. Noticing the caller ID and knowing that they would never ring unless it was a real emergency, she slid her finger across the answer button and bought the phone to her ear.

"Montgomery" She answered with her signature last name.

"Addison." Richard Webber's voice from the other end of the phone spoke, regret, exhaustion and sadness clouding his voice.

"What do you need Richard?" Addison asked, trying hard to keep the enthusiasm out of her voice at the prospect of working at Seattle Grace Mercy West once again.

She listened closely as Richard explained the current situation that every surgeon at Seattle Grace Mercy West was facing, how testing it was on all of them and how they needed her to help them. She didn't need to think twice when he asked if she would do it.

"I'll be there in fifteen minutes" She said before hanging up on him, no doubt leaving him with a question upon his tongue as he wondered how she could get there so fast.

* * *

Addison approached the doors of Seattle Grace with caution yet some level of ease and familiarity, taking a few moments to compose herself, she looked through the glass door in front of her and saw Richard making his way towards the glass, passing security and meeting her outside the door. Yet she still remained staring at the building, basking in the memories that the place holds. Coming to a stand-still next to her, he spoke slowly.

"How did you get here so fast, Addison?"

She let out a small laugh before replying, "Coincidence really," She said looking towards him, not having to look up due to her natural height and her heels, "I was on my way to a job interview at Seattle Pres. when you rang me."

Richard was taken aback, for what reason, she couldn't be sure but shock adorned his face following those words. They stood once again in a comfortable silence for a few moments before Addison spoke.

"So, shall we go save those babies you asked me to come and save?" She asked, the excitement at working here once again shining through in her turquiose eyes.

Richard sensed her excitement and it forced a smile, an exhausted smile but a smile nonetheless, to spread across his face. "Sure Addie, let's go" He said, placing a hand upon her shoulder and leading her past the hospital's security.

* * *

Donned in her signature pale pink scrubs, Addison Montgomery enters the chaos-stricken ICU room to see a flourish of activity, to see Christina and Hunt trying to restart the brunette's heart, to see Richard join Meredith in checking for internal bleeding, to see Alex and Avery assessing lacerations, abrasions, incisions and contusions and Derek checking the brain for any un-ruptured aneurysm's or brain injuries.

She doesn't know why, but it shocks her to still see Meredith and Derek here, she heard about the plane crash that they were involved in just five months ago, and wonders why, because if it was her, she would get the hell away from Seattle, again. She wonders why they haven't. She wonders what it is that keeps them here.

All whilst thinking this she unknowingly had a conversation with Alex, of all people, about what was going on with the twin babies the brunette was most likely unknowingly carrying. Taking the ultrasound wand out of his hand, Addison ran it over the girl's still flat stomach. She looked closer at the screen, noticing the problem and thanking the lord that she was only fifteen minutes away, had she been any further away the baby would not have made it another 10 minutes. Straightening herself up, she looks around at the pleading eyes looking at her for answers to do with the brunette's unborn child. She took a deep breath before looking Richard directly in the eyes, letting him know just how lucky he was that she wasn't too far away when he rang.

"Book and OR, we have 10 minutes tops to save this woman's baby. Who knows where the father is?" She says receiving a look of uncertainty from everyone in the room.

"Okay then, who's with her?" Addison asks.

"There's two FBI teams in the waiting area, not sure which ones hers though. You'll just have to ask which one, just ask for Kensi Blye" Meredith tells her husband's ex-wife, whom she now gets along with fairly well, not that she'd ever tell Derek that.

"Okay, Alex come with me, I'm gonna need your help if I have to deal with two teams of FBI agents. Can someone prep her whilst I'm talking to her colleagues?" Addison says no hint of humour in her voice at all, showing everyone in the room that what she is going to have to do is bad.

* * *

Hetty is the first one to see the two doctor's head towards them, one she recognises as one of Kensi's doctors, and the other she doesn't. Seeing how deep the two doctors are in conversation, she decides to head towards them knowing what they are about to say is not good. Everyone else sees Hetty stand, and are all about to follow her lead when she stops them all with a glance that says a thousand words. The two doctors stopped outside of the ICU waiting room doors, watching the small woman make her way over to the door and opening it, stopping just two foot short of Addison. Alex and Addison looked at each other before looking back at the woman, who seemingly already knows what the two doctors are going to say.

"What do you need me to sign doctors?" the tiny woman asked, her hand outstretched for the clipboard tucked underneath Alex's arm. He handed it to her slowly whilst Addison started to explain the procedure to her, but the smaller woman froze and the word 'pregnant'.

"I'm sorry? She's pregnant? How far along?" the smaller woman asked in a panic, stealing glances at the shaggy haired blonde man sitting with his head in his hands.

Addison took a deep breath, "Yes, she's pregnant, and we'd say about four months along," Addison took another deep breath before finishing, "with twins"

Hetty looked once again to the blonde man, who Alex and Addison now concluded to be the boyfriend due to his body language. "And why exactly does she need to be operated on?" the woman asked, concern showing through for the woman she thought of as her daughter.

Once again a look was shared between Alex and Addison, their need for verbal communication gone as they spoke through their eyes, "Well, one of the babies went into distress fifteen minutes before I arrived, prompting the head of this case to call me because no-one in this hospital is qualified enough to perform this procedure. The placenta has wrapped itself around the neck of the distressed baby, causing blood and air flow to become restricted, so I need permission to open Kensi up and un-wrap the placenta before blood and air flow is cut off completely." Addison explained.

The smaller woman took in a deep breath, "Can you guarantee that she'll be okay?" Looking the neo-natal surgeon in the eyes with a steely gaze"

"I can, I'm the best surgeon in the world to do with babies, and I have performed this surgery many of times. She's in good hands, ma'am." Addison said sincerely, her voice not wavering once despite the intense glare the NCIS unit chief is giving her.

"Okay then," Hetty said, signing the clipboard and handing it back to Alex.

"She'll be okay," Addison said as she and Alex walked away to scrub in for the surgery.

"I hope so, if not for mine then his sake" Hetty said, more to herself than anyone else.

* * *

***Meanwhile in Kensi's ICU room***

"You think they'll skirt around their feelings again or just give in for a day?" Meredith asked once they had stabilised Kensi and were prepping her for the OR.

"Well," Richard spoke from his spot by the door. "If my plan goes right then if they do give into their feelings for just today then they can for a while." He said nonchalantly.

"What do you mean?" Jackson asked.

"I mean, Addison was here so fast because she was on her way to an interview at Seattle pres. So, I was thinking, because she obviously wants to move back here, maybe I could hire her." Richard said.

"You think she would go for it?" Derek asked from beside Meredith.

"Oh, definitely." Richard replied, walking out just as Addison and Alex turned the corner, laughing and joking like they had never spent a day apart, let alone a year and a half.

It was seven hours, a successful surgery and one drink in Joe's later that Alex and Addison confronted their ever-existent feelings.

* * *

It had been just over a day since Emily came out of surgery, and Reid had not left her side, despite the many times the persistent nurses tried to move him. A day in which he spent with his hand clasped in hers, a day in which he has spent thinking about nothing but him and the brunette before him. Thinking about what would happen when she wakes up. What will happen to her and her career? What will happen when Strauss gets wind of her suicide attempt? Will she be fired, or sent away? What will happen to him? She's been his rock since he was rescued from Hankel's captivity. She was the first one she told about her former addiction, the one to turn to when things got too tough. She was the one to save him, she's the reason he's getting clean. And if she dies, he doesn't know what he'll do with himself.

He wanted to help her, he really did. He wanted the woman he loved to get better, but he had no idea on how to do that without her pushing him away. He was scared. He was so scared and he would never normally admit it but he was terrified that he would never get back the woman he loved. Even if she woke up, who was to say she'd ever be the Emily he knew before? If she had willingly drank the bleach once, what was to say she wasn't going to try again until it worked? Who was to say that she wasn't going to live a life under strict medication and daily check-ups with a psychiatrist? What's to say that she wouldn't wake up without an inch of damage, the probability was high, and with the amount of bleach she consumed and the amount of times she cut herself, she would have to live with the repercussions forever.

Nevertheless, he still clung tightly to her hand, his own clasped in her pale bandaged one, he never once let go. He slept in that position. He ate in that position. He never let go because he knew what it was like to wake up alone, to have no-one, to have no-one sitting next to you, willing the life to flow through your body. He knew what it was like. And he didn't want it for her.

That's why, when he felt a tired, weak squeeze on his fingers, his eyes flew up immediately to the fluttering eyelids belonging to his girlfriend. Those eyes, that covered by the heavy lids, those brown eyes; that over the past few weeks slowly drained of all colour and life, of all hope and forgiveness, of all love and compassion, those eyes that slowly died and took part of his heart with him, too.

He watched her closely, begging her to wake up and regain consciousness, because he couldn't spend another breathing moment not knowing if anything had happened to her. He watched as her eyes fluttered open and shut, adjusting to the harsh light overhead. He watched as his girlfriend woke up from hell.

* * *

As far as 'friendships' go in regards to having sex with your old boss; whom you just so happened to sleep with just before she left for another city, things should be awkward according to anyone you asked. But they weren't, things were far from awkward. Things were quickly swinging into old times; they were working together like a well-oiled machine. They were working together like things had never changed, like the almost-kiss never happened, but still like the kiss in Joe's happened, they were working together like a couple. Like she hadn't just upped and moved to LA without an inch of notice, like he hadn't run off with Rebecca. They were acting as if nothing happened, but still like everything had happened. And they wouldn't have it any other way.

They stood staring into Kensi's room, watching the lines flick up and down on the machine in an even beat, keeping a close eye on the smaller machine hooked up to the woman's abdomen, too watching the flicking lines go up and down in a steady beat, following the actions of the bigger machine.

Addison tried to keep her attention on the stats of the patient, but found it hard due to her wandering eyes that kept travelling to the man that stood next to her, the man that had her screaming with pleasure only three hours previous. The man that despite the many times she has tried to deny it; owns her heart.

Little did she know, he was thinking the exact same thing and too kept looking at her when she was not looking at him. Unfortunately, or rather fortunately, she turned to him as he was turning away, blue eyes locked on blue, and they knew they couldn't stop the inevitable conversation, only put it off.

"You know, we really need to talk about this" Alex said, after a few minutes of silence, accompanied by their locked eyes and the gradual, yet unnoticeable, step closer to each other.

"Yeah," Addison sighed, "I guess we do"

"I just want you to know that last night; it wasn't just some fling to me. What happened, it didn't feel wrong to me, and I know it didn't for you. I know. It wasn't a fling because it felt like a long time coming; and it would have only happened if you had come back six months ago or five years from now. It would have happened, and I'm so glad that it did, because I didn't know if I would be able to hide it from you any longer, Addie. I wouldn't have been able to hide the fact that I wanted to kiss you and hold you, I wouldn't of, okay? And sure, you don't have to say anything to me but I just wanted you to know that it wasn't a fling to me, it never was and it never will be." Alex said, not once taking a breath and looking down at the floor, following his near proclamation of love.

Addison was in shock, she never once thought that Alex Karev, her ex-intern, the source of her broken heart, the guy that she was thinking about all that time in LA, the guy that she was thinking of when she was with all those other people in LA. The guy that still to this day, owns her heart.

She took a deep breath, collection her thoughts before speaking. "It wasn't a fling, Alex; you felt the same things that I did. I came back here, came back to the place that I guess was always my home because I missed you. Sure, I missed the place and the people and the hospital. But it was you that I was thinking of all that time down in LA. So, I just want you to know too that it wasn't a fling for me. It wasn't like that time in the on-call room when I used you to get over my broken heart, it only broke more when I realised that I hurt you. That is what hurt me the most, knowing that I hurt you. And you know, I wouldn't have complained if you had just grabbed me and kissed me, I really wouldn't of." Addison said, her head and heart feeling a million times lighter than yesterday when she arrived, shocked that her, Addison Forbes Montgomery, Satan, had close to professed her love for her ex-intern.

It was Alex that time that stood in shock, his blue eyes caught hers, locking them in an intense staring competition. Anything that couldn't be said in words being said through their eyes, through the art of emotions. For they had always been able to have a full conversation with their eyes, their friends always did tell them they were made for each other.

Through their locked eyes, they hadn't realised that they had slowly inched closer together. Their foreheads almost touching, their hands entwined, until a faint cough resounded from behind them. They turned abruptly, their hands still entwined, and they stood face to face with the daughter of the blonde patient.

"Oh sorry, did I uh, interrupt something?" Her voice conveyed awkwardness and so did her eyes, but they twinkled with mischievousness that only a teenagers can, they showed that she wouldn't care if they were to continue.

"What can I do for you, um?" Addison said, her last word clearly asking the girls name.

"Riley, or Riles. And I was uh, just wondering how she was? I'm the only one out of our uh, family that's allowed back here, because I'm the only one related by blood. So uh, how's she doing?" The blonde girl asked, struggling to keep in her emotions.

"She's doing good; you obviously heard that she's pregnant right?" Addison asked, continuing once her question received a nod from the petite blonde, "Well they're all doing extremely good, but the next twenty four hours are crucial." Addison said, glancing down at her and Alex's entwined hands.

"So, can I see her?" Riley asked, her voice laced with hope.

"Sure," this time it was Alex that spoke, "Just be sure to tell anyone that her doctors gave you permission to be in there," He said with a smile to the girl.

"Thank you doctors, thank you for saving her." She said with a humble smile.

Alex and Addison nodded, watching as the girl walked hesitantly into the hospital room.

"So," Addison said, looking down once again at their entwined hands. "What are we going to do?" She knew she was staying in Seattle, and she knew that she wanted to be with Alex, it just mattered what he wanted.

"Well, I know what I want, but," He said, pulling her towards him and lowering his mouth to her ear. "I'll have to tell you in private," He said, letting go of her hand and sending a last glance to her before turning the corner and heading into the most private on-call room in the hospital.

Addison spared one last glance at the blonde sleeping at her Aunt's bedside, before turning and near running into the on-call room.

* * *

Lexie and Mark lay in an on-call room, limbs entwined, breath laboured, both hoping and praying that their pagers wouldn't go off, the case they're currently working makes no time for others. All of their time is being taken up by this case, seeing all those injuries reminded them of the event that occurred a mere five months ago, or four months rather for them.

They lay in comfortable silence, their breaths being the only sounds filling the dimly lit room. Her head lay on his chest, as she thought of how close she was to losing all of this, of losing him. His arms were wrapped around her small frame, thinking the same as her, of how close he came to losing her and how he couldn't bear it if he did.

The shrill sound of pagers going off pierced the air and the moment, and they hurried to get ready and into the patient's room. Upon arrival, all they actually see is Derek sitting in a chair charting.

"Derek, what the hell man?" Mark asked, as he sat down in the sofa in the room, Lexie soon collapsing next to him.

"Well, someone had to get you out of that room, and I pulled the short straw, so here you are" He said sarcastically, a smile forming at his last words.

At that moment, however, the heart monitors attached to JJ grabbed the attention of the two attending's and the chief resident.

Eyelids fluttered and the heart monitor calmed, to which the three doctors let out a sigh of relief. They sat down once again by the bed and hoped for a miracle, if not for the woman then the teams and her daughter at the least. That's when the unexpected happened; the thing that shouldn't have happened for at least another week.

She opened her eyes.

* * *

**A/N: So your list of ships in this fic. - yes, I do ship ALL of these.**

**Spencer/Emily(CM)**

**Nell/Eric(NCIS:LA)**

**Kensi/Deeks(NCIS:LA)**

**Lexie/Mark(Grey's)**

**Callie/Arizona(Grey's)**

**Derek/Meredith(Grey's)**

**Owen/Cristina(Grey's)**

**Addison/Alex(Grey's)**

**April/Jackson(Grey's)**

**PS: I made Lexie chief resident because I felt had Chyler not wanted to leave and Lexie not have died, she would have become chief resident.**

**PPS: I know some of these ships have not been introduced yet but they will.**

**PPPS: This fic will most likely be over in one or two chapters, hence the length. **

**PPPPS: Yes, I did leave Owen and Cristina together.**

**PPPPPS: I realised I had been spelling Cristina wrong this whole time.**

**PLEASE REVIEW.**


	20. Chapter 19

**A/N: For any typos, I apologise, I wrote this on the side of a mountain waiting for a tyre repair. PLOT TWIST AHOY.**

* * *

**"Just because people do horrible things... it doesn't mean that they're horrible people.**-** Dr. Meredith Grey**

* * *

The three doctors stood in shock, staring at each other in confusion, mouths agape. All wondering the same question; how the hell was this girl awake? Okay, so she wasn't really awake, more like she opened her eyes for a few seconds then closed them again, but still, they all wondered how?

"Okay, someone tell me they have an explanation for this. Coma patients don't just open their eyes and close them again." Lexie said, despite her photographic memory she had no clue as to how this had happened.

"None at all, so I'm just gonna say it was an alien's doing" Mark said nonchalantly, acting as if what he had just said had every relevance to what they were talking about.

"Really Mark, aliens? What are you, five?" Derek laughed at his best friend, turning to his sister-in-law to see her holding back a laugh at her boyfriend's absurd comment.

"Well, you never know. I was just ruling out possibilities here." He said as he turned to look through the glass door to the nurses' station, spotting just the person he needed, "Avery" he yelled, watching as the younger attending turned around and looked at his boss and friend, "Come in here a minute."

Jackson walked into the room and stared at his mentor cautiously, something only he and Lexie could do without being in fear for their safety, "You… yelled?" He asked confused.

"Yeah, now pretty boy tell me," The older attending said, completely ignoring the glances his girlfriend and her brother-in-law were giving him, "Why did she," He said, pointing to the sleeping blonde in the bed, "just open her eyes?"

"Um, I don't know, she's your patient, not mine." Jackson stated calmly, filling out another patients chart whilst he said it.

"You're no help, you know that Avery? Go on, get outta here, go find Kepner and carry on screwing her not-so virgin ass." Mark said with a wink, letting his younger friend know that he was joking yet being completely serious.

"You're the ass, you know that right?" Jackson states.

"Yeah, he knows that." Lexie said with a grin, leaning over to give Mark a kiss before leaving the room, most likely to find her sister and niece.

The three men in the room watched her go before all looking to one another, the same thought running through all of their heads causing them all to speak in unison.

"Women"

* * *

They sat there in silence, watching the walls of the van closely, inspecting each monitor as they each showed something different. Waiting for the one or two that shows the girls, waiting so they can find out what room they're in, what floor they're on, how many doctors are on their service, and most importantly how much security watches the walls of the hospital.

They sat there with the unspoken agreement that neither one of the girls will get away unscathed. They sat there with the agreement that before they left, the girls will be theirs.

So there they sat, in an inconspicuous black removal van opposite the hospital, waiting for an opportunity to strike.

* * *

Once again there she stood, in the ICU corridor but this time instead of it being her mother's room that she is staring into, it's her not blood-related aunt's room. She watches the flickers of the heart monitors as they move up and down, watches the numbers, praying that they don't once again drop. But most of all, she watches the rise and fall of her chest, watches the slight swell of her abdomen.

She drops her head to the wall with a sigh of resignation; praying to any god that will listen that her dysfunctional family will be whole again, save for two new additions. But family nonetheless, she knows that her uncle will be a mess until she wakes up, until her aunt wakes up and he can see her. She also knows that her mother's team are a mess, with two still being in LA, one of which is in the hospital, that just leaves Hotch and Morgan, and both of them are getting stressed with all the waiting.

Footsteps approach her and she doesn't even need to turn around to know who it is. It's the one doctor, besides the blonde perky one on Heelys and the two, the red-head and the guy; that stood outside of her aunt's room yesterday; that actually cares, the one that she trusts, Callie.

"Hey," She whispers, shocked at how vulnerable and weak her voice sounds.

"Hey there" Callie says, her voice the comfort that the teenager has been looking for ever since her mother went missing.

"When," She stops because she can feel the tears rising in her throat, "when will she wake up Callie, she has to wake up" Riley says, her voice dripping with hope as she sat down on the bench outside of the room.

"Riles," Callie begins, sitting down next to her and calling her by the nickname she came up with, "You know I'm a bone doctor, so you know that I don't do all the mushy brain things that Dr. Shepard does, to be honest, I can't. But the doctor that operated on her yesterday, Addison Montgomery,"

"Is she the red-head?" Riley interrupted.

Callie laughed, "Yeah, she's the red-head, and she's also my best friend and she is the best in the world at what she does. She may seem private and stuck up, but she's not, she's an open book. And your aunt is in good hands" She told the young blonde.

Riley's eyes twinkled with an idea, the way only a teenagers could. "So, if she's your best-friend, and you can read her like an open book, that means you know what that's about then." Riley said, her eyes flicking over to the nurses' station as she said the last part.

Callie turned her head, and her mouth dropped open at what she saw. Turning back to Riley she copied the younger girls grin, "No, I don't but I will."

"Well, she's coming over here. So act cool" Riley said, before turning to face her aunt once again, keeping calm as the Latina did the same.

They sat in comfortable silence for a few moments before a shadow fell over them.

"Calliope Torres," Addison scolded, which made both girls look up in shock, "Care to tell me why your wife is having an argument with your baby daddy over her shoes?" Addison laughed, looking past the nurses' station, _God, Riley thought, does everything happen at those nurses' stations, _where Arizona and Mark were arguing over her choice of shoes.

"Eh," Callie starts, "Let them fight it out, Ari will win. But, you can't act as if nothing is going on, little miss- I have no feelings for Alex Karev so I'll just kiss him at a nurses' station and watch as he walks away with a dreamy look on my face- So don't change the subject Addie, spill, what's going on?" Callie spoke fastly.

Addison spared a glance at the young girl next to Callie, "Oh don't mind me," Riley starts, "She hears everything that goes on in this hospital Addie, she was the one who pointed you out" Callie finishes.

"Ugh fi-ine," Addison said, dropping down on the other side of Callie onto the bench. "Long story or short, ladies?" She asks as Callie and Riley look at each other, "Long" They both say simultaneously.

"So just before I left for LA, we almost kissed in the NICU, then we did kiss in Joes, then we slept together, then I told him I wasn't his girlfriend, then I left for LA. Then two nights ago we went out for drinks after Kensi's surgery," She spared a glance at the brunette sleeping in the room before them, "And we kissed in Joes, again. So we went back to the Archfield, and you know, and then yesterday we talked. And he was so sweet; he was the Alex I knew, not the arrogant, cocky guy everyone else knows, he is sweet, and romantic, and he cares about me Cal, he actually cares. And he wants a relationship with me, me, bitchy, pig-headed, messed up me. And the scary thing is I want it too. I want it all, but I only want it with him, and that scares me. But the odds aren't with us, they never have been, and the odds certainly aren't with me, look at me. When I don't want kids, I get pregnant, but when I want kids, and I go to my med school best friend who is the best fertility doctor in the world she can't even help." Addison looks at Callie, tears shining in her green eyes.

"You know what I think you should do?" Riley stated from the other side of Callie looking the red-headed surgeon in the eyes.

"What?" Addison said, trying to hold back a sob.

"Go for it. Look, I know a fifteen year old girl isn't exactly the person to get relationship advice from, but from what I've seen in the past week or so has taught me a few things. Just go for it, screw the odds, my mother got kidnapped by a psychopath because she just so happened to self-harm, and if that hasn't taught me about life lessons, then god knows what will. But screw the odds, screw people who say anything, and just follow your heart. And if your heart is telling you that you want him, you get him" Riley says, taking in the slack-jawed expressions of the two older women, leaning back in her seat with a smug smile spreading across her face.

"Addie, the girl has spoken. And from the family she comes from, I'd take her advice before she hurts you" Callie said with a wink.

"Thank you, both of you, oh and before I go, Riley, your aunt should be waking up right about now" She said with a glance over her shoulder to the brunette, who true to her words, was stirring slowly.

Riley gasped, "H-how did you do that?"

"I'm brilliant, that's how." Addison said with a smile, practically skipping away to find Alex so they can talk and do the post-op on Kensi.

Riley stared at her waking aunt, concentrating that hard that she didn't notice an arm slip around her shoulders comfortingly.

"You should go in, she'll like to see a familiar face when she comes to her senses" Callie tells her.

She leans into the embrace, "Thanks Callie, for everything."

"It's alright, I'll be here whenever you need me" Callie gives her one last smile before Riley walks into her Aunt's room, taking up residence in the chair beside her bed and clasping their hands together.

Callie sat down on the bench once again, but not before grabbing a few of her charts from the nearby nurses' station. She glanced quickly at the blonde girl, who was now talking animatedly with her aunt, a smile gracing her exhausted features. She was scribbling down post-op notes onto a patients chart when she felt two arms slink around her waist, hands clasping together resting on her stomach. A nose nuzzled the hair away from the pulse point on her neck, and she felt pink lips lightly drop kisses onto her neck, nipping and sucking as they explored familiar territory.

"So Calliope," The blonde whispered seductively into the Latina's neck, "Why don't we go home? Mark and Lexie have Sofia for the night, so we have the house to ourselves." Arizona said before returning to her earlier task of kissing the sensitive areas on Callie's neck.

"Hmm," Callie hummed appreciatively. "But I promised Riley I'd be here," She said with a glance to the blonde in the room, who smiled back at her and gave her a reassuring nod.

"Hmm, well she seems to think that it's okay for you to go home. So come on workaholic," Arizona said, moving to Callie's front and dragging her wife up by her hands. Who, once stood up, wrapped her arms around her blonde wife and captured her lips in a passionate, rather explicit, kiss.

"Let's go" Callie said, dragging her wife off to the attending's lounge to get her clothes, ready to get home for a night with her wife.

* * *

It had been a little over two days since Emily first woke up, and Spencer had not once left her side despite her pleas to get him to go to the hotel and get a change of clothes. To which he replied by pulling his go-bag from underneath her hospital bed, but that day she decided not to press him as she was getting released today.

"Spence," She said quietly.

"Yeah?" He replied.

"Please tell me we're flying to Seattle?" Emily told him, giving him no cause for argument, since that's all she's been asking for since he told her everything that Hotch told him.

"Yeah, if everything goes to plan and you get released today. We'll be on the first flight out of here. Since all the paperwork we needed to do here is done. Garcia said that she, Nell and Eric flew out two days ago, something about Kensi and a surprise. So, I guess we'll find out when we get there"

"Thanks Spence," Emily said, leaning up and giving him a tender kiss.

* * *

Meredith Grey was a mysterious woman, by all means she was. But never had she been out-mystified as Cristina put it. She couldn't understand how two women, sure they were federal agents and were trained, but she couldn't understand how they survived the injuries they had. From the gossip she heard around the hospital, her patient had been held for just under two weeks and the injuries she sustained were unbelievable and hard to look at for a doctor, so for the person suffering it she couldn't begin to imagine how painful it must've been. That's why it was so hard when she approached the two FBI teams and was immediately bombarded with questions as to JJ's health.

"Is she okay?"

"Is she awake?"

"Can we see her?"

"Wait," Meredith yelled over the flurry of voices. "Yes, she's okay." A round of sighs of relief filled the air, "Yes, she's awake," Another round of sighs, "And yes, but only two at a time. She's extremely tired, and on high amounts of medication for different things. Her heart is extremely vulnerable, and not to mention all of her other injuries. So, if you go in, you have to be extremely careful of all of her injuries and her physical and mental health."

"With all due respect Doctor," Said the red-headed woman, "We just wanna see our gum-drop"

"What she means to say, is we just wanna see JJ" The dark-skinned agent said.

"Of course, but two at a time." Meredith said, before turning around, with the two agents at her heels.

"Meredith?" Meredith turned around to the voice, a voice that she hadn't heard since before she started med school. Turning around she was looking into the face of her childhood best friend.

"Emily?" She said, watching the brunette's face light up in happiness, her face most likely a mirror image.

"So you're a doctor here huh? When did that happen?" Emily smiled; her face turning into a smile.

"Um, about 7 years ago," She looks down at her navy scrubs, where her hands lie, clearly showing off her wedding and engagement rings.

"You got married too?! You, Meredith Grey, the girl who said and I quote- 'I am never ever getting married because getting married is for sappy people, and I am not a sappy person. I am a hard-core person' Let me guess, you're gonna say that he's rich and you two have kids running around the place."

"Um, well, he's a surgeon here too, and no, not kids. One kid."

"Wow, so when can I meet him?" Emily asked.

"Meet who?" Spoke a deep voice from behind them.

Meredith whipped round, and stood face to face with the subject of the conversation.

"Derek, hi" She said with a small smile.

"Oh, oh, OH" Emily says with recognition. "So this is the guy that broke your pact. Well he's, nice Death, good choice"

Meredith buried her head in Derek's chest, trying to prevent the smile that slowly spreads its way across her face at the mention of her old nickname.

"Okay, so I don't know what I just walked in on, so someone tell me?" He said, aiming his question towards Meredith in particular, but looking towards the brunette who has a sly grin covering her face.

"Derek, meet Emily, my ex-best friend," She says with a hint of laughter, "Emily, meet Derek. And well you can figure out the rest." She says before burying her head once again.

"Oh so you're the one she slept her way round Europe with in college?" Derek said, earning a groan from both girls as they both dropped their heads on their other halves shoulder.

"Derek! Just, show the Agent's to JJ's room, I need to go catch up with my best friend." She said, before leaning forward and grabbing Emily's hand, giving Derek a kiss before dragging her best friend away.

"Well that was different, anyway, just follow me and forget anything they say. It's how we survive in this place." He said with a smile, which earned a laugh from the two teams.

* * *

"So you, Meredith Grey, married with a kid, well, never thought I'd see the day." Emily joked, as her and Meredith walked arm in arm across the bridge leading to the surgical floor.

"Well you know; people change" She said with a smile.

"Yeah but Mer, you're not exactly normal." Emily joked once again which earned her a slap on the arm.

"Meaning?"

"Meaning you can probably still drink twice your body weight in tequila." Emily said.

"Yeah that's true." Meredith said, her voice dripping with proudness.

"Hey Mer, have you seen Mark anywhere?" Shouted someone from behind the two women.

The women turned around to find Lexie Grey standing in front of them. "Oh, hi" She said nervously.

"Lex, this is Emily, my childhood best-friend. Em, this is Lexie, my sister" Meredith said, "And Mark, he's down at day care with Sofia, I think. You've got her tonight right?"

"Yeah, but I can't find him. He said Callie and Arizona have already gone to go on some date or something and to meet him in the attending's lounge but he's not there" Lexie said, suddenly becoming panicked for her boyfriend and the child that is like a daughter to her.

"Calm down Lex, he's probably down in day care with Derek, just go look for him and page him." Meredith told her sister, watching the younger girl as her features calmed.

"Thanks Mer, and Emily, nice to finally meet you" Lexie said before turning to head for the day care.

"Okay, now you really need to explain everything to me, you have a sister?!" Emily said, stopping just by an on-call room.

"Yes, two actually." Meredith said.

"Okay, explain now." Emily told her, fixing her with her steely gaze that makes the toughest of criminals break.

"So Thatcher got married after he left and got married with two kids, I found out when his wife died of the hiccups and Molly, my other sister, had a baby and she needed surgery." Meredith told her.

"Okay so that's the sister thing sorted. Now tell me all about this Derek and Mark and why your sister is looking after someone else's kid" Emily said confused.

"So Mark, Lexie's boyfriend, he slept with his best friend Callie, when her girlfriend now wife, Arizona left for Africa, he got her pregnant and him and Lexie split up. And then five months ago we were in a plane crash," Meredith looked down at the floor, not looking up to meet her best friend's gaze, "And Lexie, Mark and Arizona almost died. Arizona almost had to have her leg amputated until Callie could fix it, but after Mark and Lexie realised how much they loved each other they got back together. Hence how Lexie looks after Sofia. And Derek, what do you want to know?"

Emily took a few deep breaths to process everything, how could her best friend have been in a plane crash and she not know about it? "Um, everything!" She said nonchalantly, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "How did you meet?" This earned a laugh from Meredith and she knew immediately it was a good story, it always was with Mer.

"It was in a bar, before we both started out jobs here, me as an intern and him an attending. We had a one night stand, and things just happened from there. And here we are seven years later, married with a daughter."

"You've turned soppy" Emily stated bluntly, "But still, that's cute. Tall, dark and handsome, Mer, I approve."

"I didn't really care for your approval, Em" Meredith said with a laugh.

"Just remember who carries a gun and catches serial killers for a living" Emily said.

"Just remember who could cut you open and kill all of your limbs with one cut to your central nervous system but still keep you alive." Meredith said dryly.

"Okay you win" Emily said laughing, linking her arms through the blondes once again they headed towards Kensi's room.

"Grey" Came yet another familiar shout from the nurses' station.

"Ugh, what now" She moaned to Emily, which earned a laugh from the brunette agent. "What April? I'm trying to have a conversation here." She said turning around to face the bubbly red-head.

"Well, I was going to say that the Chief was looking for you, Alex and Addison. But considering the recent revelation, I thought you would be the easiest to find" April said.

"Why, what's the recent- oh, they slept together again didn't they?" Meredith said.

"Yep, and I'm pretty sure they've been in an on-call room for most of the day so I'd prefer to not bother them" April said.

"Okay then, tell him I'll be half an hour" Meredith yelled to April, watching as the red-head walked away to the chief's office.

"Does everyone in this hospital sleep together?" Emily asked from her place leaning against the side of the nurses' station, watching as Meredith grabbed Kensi's chart and headed into the room, Emily not far behind her.

* * *

They watched the screen closely, watched as the tall brunette spoke with the small, blonde doctor who was running a load of tests on their brunette. Their girl.

They watched with excitement, anticipation, at the fact that now they were here and not in LA, now they were here the plan could be put into action. The fight to get back their girls, their property.

And what a hell of a fight it will be.

* * *

**A/N; Okay, if you watch Grey's, basically forget that Sadie ever existed, and everything her and Meredith did together she did with Emily. ****One more ****chapter****left****! ****Review****, s'il vous plait mes copains. **


	21. Final Chapter

**A/N: Last chapter! Keep an eye out for the sequel- 'No More Sorrow'. Plus, I'm not American, so I apologise to anyone that is if I got the school system wrong, things work differently in England. Oh and the sand eating thing, well let's just say me and my friend did it to someone when we were in reception- funniest thing ever. Oh yeah, forget Henry ever died. Teddy and he got married, etc. But he never died.**

**Okay I'm just asking everyone to please review this chapter, because me and Larissa, we spent five or so days straight working on this, we worked till late each night, worked through school, most likely ditching very important assignments, I worked through detention for an hour each night and we sometimes worked through lunch. So we've not stopped, we've re-wrote paragraphs at least ten times to make it perfect. So we would really, really appreciate it if we didn't have just one reviewer this chapter. (Larissa you don't count ;))**

**Note; after the second page break, so the second line that I have inserted, all paragraphs, be them different people, are set in the same time.**

* * *

"**I'm going to say this once. And then I am not going to say it again. I'm not broken. I'm not some psychodrama. My lack in interest in not having a child is not some pathology that you can pat yourself on the back for having diagnosed. I like my life. I like it the way it is and I don't want it to change. I thought I liked it with you in it. I hope I am not wrong."- Dr. Arizona Robbins; Hook, Line and Sinner, 6x20.**

* * *

Meredith and Emily sat in Kensi's room, the former charting and looking up towards the monitors every five minutes, the latter just staring at her new found friend, shock still adorning her exhausted features at the fact that the woman lying motionless in front of her is pregnant, with twins.

However, despite the sombre mood hovering in the sterile hospital room, the two friends laughed and joked as the reminisced over their school days; elementary, middle and high; their college days, and Mer's med school days. They remembered the time when they told a boy in their kindergarten class that if he ate sand he would fly, and they laughed when they remembered the looks on their mother's faces when they got caught.

They were laughing so hard for so long that when Kensi's red-headed doctor walked in they didn't notice, just like they didn't notice nor hear when said doctor was trying to get Meredith's attention.

"Mer? MER? MERDITH?" Addison yelled, waving her hand in front of Meredith's face.

"Oh hey Addison." Meredith says to her husband's ex-wife, "Have you met Emily, she's a hot shot FBI agent now," Meredith says, the last part dripping with her and Emily's trademark sarcasm, sending a wink to the person in question, receiving a scowl in return.

"Hey," The red-head says in greeting to Emily, "Now Mer, can you please come and calm down McPerky out here, she's freaking out over something," Meredith rolls her eyes at the statement, knowing that sometimes only she can calm down Arizona.

"What's wrong with her now, I best not have to deal with some my-wife-is-ignoring-me-and-I-think-she's-gonna-leave-me thing again, because I have told her too many times that Callie is not going to leave her" Meredith mutters as she stands to leave the room.

"Okay, now I never thought I'd see the day when someone would come to Meredith for relationship advice, the only people who would ever come to her for advice were me and Arizona, but that was when we were back in high school and college" Emily says to no-one in particular, as Addison sat down in the seat formerly vacated by Meredith.

"You and Meredith went to school together?" Addison asks in curiosity.

"Yep, we've known each other since we were four" Emily says looking over towards the red-head.

"And this Arizona," Addison asks on a hunch, "How long have you known her?"

"Since our senior year of high school," Emily told her, watching as the red-heads eyebrows arched in thought.

/

"How could you not tell me?" Arizona yelled at her long-time friend.

"Um, I forgot?" Meredith told her sheepishly.

"You forgot? You forgot to tell me that one of my best friends that I haven't seen in years is in this hospital right now? What is she doing here?" Arizona asked her, panic rising up through her.

"Um, she's actually in that room." Meredith said, pointing to the room behind her, "And she's an FBI agent, she came with the herd downstairs" The petite blonde said, playfully glaring at one of her bestfriend's.

"Yes I knew she was an FBI agent, and what do you mean she's in that room?" The slightly taller paed's surgeon asked.

"I mean, she's in that room because her friend was kidnapped and tortured by a crazy person, and her friend, she also happens to be pregnant. And her other friend, well, you know how bad of a state she's in." Meredith close to snapped at her perky friend.

"I know Mer, but it's been years since we last saw each other, what if I see her and I make her feel worse?" Arizona asked, burying her face in her best friend's shoulder.

"Ari, when have you ever made someone feel worse?" Meredith asked her best friend.

"Um, never?" Arizona said, glancing towards Kensi's hospital room, where she could make out the outline of her friend's heads.

"Exactly, now, I'll get Addison out of that room and then we can all talk, yeah?" Mer says, watching Arizona nod in response, "Okay, go find Alex" Meredith said, lifting her friends head off of her shoulder and watching as a confused expression covered her face.

"Go find Alex so that we can get Addison out of the room moron" Meredith deadpanned, watching the confusion work its way out of the blondes face and realisation spread in.

"Kay" The perky blonde rolled away, leaving Meredith standing there for a few minutes until she rolled back into sight, Alex trailing at her heels.

"Okay Robbins, you gonna tell me why I'm here? Because my patient is clearly fine" Alex said, annoyed as he watched the grins work their way across Meredith's and Arizona's faces.

"What? What have you two done now? I swear you have telekinesis or something?" He said sighing.

"Nope, we," Meredith started, walking towards Alex, "just need you to go in there and get Addison out, I'm sure you can think of something to do," She grinned, laughing slightly at the childish grin adorning Arizona's face.

"Ugh fine" Alex groaned, as he walked into the room and muttered some words in Addison's ear, that, by the way Emily was laughing, most likely made her blush.

They watched as she stood up slowly, leaving the room in something that could be called a delayed hurry, as she ran off after Alex down the corridor. The two blondes laughed as they studied the couple as they kissed somewhere they thought no-one could see them, watching as they stumbled into the closest on-call room they could find.

"Ready?" Mer asked, just as the door swung open to reveal the person that they were headed into see.

"Mer what's taking so lo-" Emily stopped short as she stared open mouthed at the woman in front of her.

"Ari, is that you?" Emily asked, shock once again touching her features.

"Hey Em, long time no see" Arizona smiled at the brunette in front of her.

* * *

It was nearing 1pm and once again Emily found herself sitting on the bench outside of Kensi's room, Ari and Mer had gotten a 911 page which in turn resulted in Emily's loneliness.

She sat staring at the woman's constantly growing stomach, so deep in thought that she didn't notice nor hear when someone sat down beside her.

"Do you have kids?" She turned to the source of the voice, and found herself looking at none other than Addison.

"No, you?" She replied.

"I wish, I sometimes think you know, if I hadn't of made stupid decisions or waited, if my life was different, if I would have kids, you ever think that?" Addison asked the brunette, for some reason finding herself being able to confide in her.

"Yeah, all the time. I just think, if I hadn't of made stupid decisions when I was a teenager, then I would be able to have kids or would have kids now but, life screws you up, you know?" Emily told the red-head, her too being able to confide in the other.

"Hell do I know that, maybe if life didn't screw me up I wouldn't be divorced, a cheater and child-less" Addison told Emily.

"You know, I don't know why I'm telling you this, it's probably because you don't seem like one to judge, but being an ambassador's daughter I never really got much attention from my mother, so I acted out, I did drugs and everything. But I got pregnant, at 15 and had an abortion and I like to believe that because I did that, every bad thing that happens to me, happens as a punishment" Emily told Addison, keeping her head low.

"I had the same problem you know, growing up as a rich kid. Most rich kids have to choice to flaunt it or hide it, but I didn't, because of my name," Addison said, which earned a confused look from Emily, "I'm a Forbes Montgomery, so my parents, Bizzy and the Captain, they expect me to be perfect. But I'm not, I cheated on my husband, who you now know as Meredith's husband and I slept with his best friend, which got me pregnant. And I had an abortion, too. And I just think, what would have happened if I had not had one" Addison said, tears pooling behind her eyes at the thought of everything she could have had.

"I suppose all we can think is what ifs really. Neither of us will know. But I couldn't do what you do, saving and delivering babies every day when you want one yourself, it would kill me." Emily said, smiling slightly at the red-head as she said the last few words.

"It's for the better," She said, looking up as she saw Alex looking, or staring, at her from the nurses' station, "I gotta go, but she will wake up" Addison said before walking away, grabbing Alex's wrist as she walked past and pulled him with her, Emily watching all the while laughing at the both of them before she turned once again to watch Kensi through the glass door.

* * *

"You think she's gonna make it, kid?"

The two men had been previously silent as they had made their way down to the small cafeteria at Seattle Grace, both lost in their own thoughts about what was happening, but as they waited in the line, Morgan knew that he had to voice what everybody had been thinking since they had found JJ curled on the floor beside her friend seven days before. Were they going to get back the JJ that they had once known? Would they ever have JJ or would they simply be living with the shell that once was her?

"Well she's awake, so statistically her chances-" Reid began, stopping as Morgan held up his hand with a loud huff.

"Reid, I don't care about statistics. Not while she's going through this. How did we never see that she hurts herself? How did we never see what she and Em feel they have to do to cope?" Morgan asked defeatedly, not able to stop his mind from running back over the time that he had known the two women, trying to find something, anything, that he had missed.

"They didn't want us to see. Emily's a profiler and JJ might as well be one; they know what we look for and they made sure they didn't do it."

"Will we ever get her back? Are we ever getting either of them back after this?"

"She went through a lot, Morgan. Even if we do get JJ back, I don't think she'll ever be the same JJ we knew before, and Emily... she nearly lost the only person that knows her. If JJ doesn't come back, I don't think Emily will be back either," the genius said sadly, opening his mouth to continue and slamming it shut when he heard a muffled bang. "Was that...?"

"Reid, I think we got a problem."

"What the hell..?"

\/\/\/\/\

As an older man, Richard Webber would be the first person to admit that on the occasion there were things that he didn't hear, but the sound that had literally made the glass of his office shake was something that he couldn't miss, and it was also something that he had heard before. If he had never heard it he would have passed it off as nothing, but as the memory of Gary Clark came back to him, he knew that this was not 'nothing'. Someone was shooting in his hospital; again.

"This is not happening again. I am not losing any more of my doctors to a psychopath with a gun."

Dropping his pen to his desk, Richard stood and moved towards the glass window that looked over part of the hospital, his eyes widening when he saw that this was not just one disgruntled family member with a handgun; there was more than one of them and they were most definitely not carrying hand guns. Pulling back from the glass, he leant back against the bookcase on the far wall, quickly sending out a code black to as many doctors as he could while trying to compose himself and think of a way to get all of his people out safely and alive.

/\/\/\/\/\

She was sitting quietly, locked up in a supply closet with charts stacked high above her on both sides. She never actually realised how far behind she was on her paper work when she went to find the blood work on a ten year old girl in for a transplant, who currently was lying on bypass.

Immersed in charts and post-op notes, she hardly noticed when two strong, familiar arms wrapped themselves around her lithe form, hands falling on top of her busy ones, fingers interlocking with her skilled ones. She let out a small shriek of delight and fear, the former being that she knew who the hands belonged to, the latter being that the shock caught the former army surgeon of guard; something that only happens when he's around. She turned in his arms, green eyes locking with his brown as she leant up and kissed him passionately, only drawing away when air became a necessity.

"What are you doing here?" She asked curiously, wondering why he was there, as she was supposed to meet him in the lobby in an hour.

"So you're not happy to see your husband, huh?" He told her teasingly, taking her ear lobe between his teeth and nipping gently.

"Of course, but I was supposed to be meeting you in the lobby in an hour" She told him, trying to supress a moan at what he was doing to her ear.

"Teds, you were supposed to be meeting me in the lobby a half hour ago" He said, smiling against the crook of her neck.

"Oh, shit" She cursed, picking up the pager that was discarded on the floor beside her and glanced quickly at the time. "Sorry," She said turning around once again to glance into his eyes, watching a smile creep up his face as he started to laugh, to which she silenced him with a kiss, a rather steamy kiss, one which turned very passionate in a matter of seconds.

Once air once again became a necessity, they pulled apart only to inhale enough air before capturing each-others lips, tongues battling for dominance when Teddy's pager pierced the hot air with its shrill call.

She blindly reached for it, as Henry continued to ravish her neck with hot, wet kisses, sucking and nipping every now and then leaving marks. Pulling the pager up to her eye sight, she read the message plastered across the screen of the black device, immediately tensing as she remembered what happened the last time she received that message. Henry picked up on her nervousness, and he drew back to look her in the eyes, "What is it?" He asked.

She looked at him with terror filled eyes, her mind swimming with memories from her time in Iraq and the last time the code was called in the hospital.

"It's code black… they've called a code black"

/\/\/\/\

It was remarkable. She had no idea how the woman had not only managed to stay alive herself, but also keep her babies alive, but that was the kind of strength that Bailey had always admired, and she couldn't help but feel relieved for the woman that she was finally free. Being kidnapped was one thing, but she couldn't imagine how much pain and fear both women must have felt during the time they were taken, and as she quickly administered the allowed dose of sedative, she slowly shook her head in disgust. Some people just shouldn't be allowed on the streets, and if what had been done to the two women was anything to go by, their kidnapper was most definitely one of them.

"You and your friend are strong. I don't know how you're still here, and I really don't know how you're still pregnant, but those things alone show everyone how strong you are," she whispered to the comatose woman, quickly wrapping her hand around Kensi's and squeezing it lightly before pulling away again. "At least those babies mean one thing, though. If he didn't use protection, you can't get pregnant once you already are," she added, her eyes flicking down to the growing bump.

Although she knew that Kensi being in a medically induced coma was the best thing for her as she healed, Bailey couldn't help but feel sad about the fact that the younger woman was missing out on her own pregnancy. She couldn't see how her stomach was growing to accommodate her children, and though she could probably feel them kicking lightly, she more than likely wouldn't remember it when she woke up.

"I'm sorry this happened to you."

Looking down when she heard her pager beep, she pulled the black device from her belt and held it to her line of sight, feeling her heart skip a beat as she read the words flashing on the screen. 'Code Black'. She remembered the last time those words had flashed on her pager and she quickly rushed to the window, slamming the blinds closed when she saw that there was nobody out there but doctors.

"Oh, no. No, no, not again. One gun to my head is enough for this lifetime."

/\/\/\/\

He was happy like this, watching his wife and little girl interact in the day care. He knew he was being soppy, if Mark were here he would tell him to snap out of it only for Derek to remind him that he was just as soft with his daughter, to which Mark would just reply with a glare reserved for Derek before falling silent.

He watched them play with the building blocks, laughing softly to himself when Meredith would knock them down purposely just to see her baby girl laugh. He knew to anyone outside of the hospital his actions would be bordering on stalker-like, but everyone in the hospital has learned that when he is like this, it's best to just leave him alone. He watches for a few more minutes before moving towards the door of the day care, opening it slowly as to not startle the two most important women in his life.

He walked slowly over to them, wrapping his arms around her waist, watching her jump slightly, making Zola giggle. He kissed her cheek, feeling the smile spread across her face, making her features just that more beautiful. She laid her head on his shoulder in contentment, and they both watched as their daughter toddled around the day care.

They were silent, no words needed to be spoken, however fate had other plans. As both of the pagers went off simultaneously, they both fumbled in the pockets of their lab coats, looking for said item.

They looked at each other and then their daughter when they read the message displayed on their screen. Their minds both rewinding to the last time it happened, and the events that occurred on that fateful day. Their eyes wandered also to the black haired girl now playing with Zola, and how she could have been left with only one parent five months ago, they thought about Mark, and Callie, and Arizona and if they were panicking as much as they thought they would be over their little girl.

And once again, they looked to their still flashing pagers that lit up with the words-

"Code black, hospital in lockdown"

/\/\/\/\

She missed this, just watching him operate. Sure, for a hot shot surgeon like him a rhinoplasty was no big deal, but she missed this. Just standing in the gallery like an over-excited intern who was viewing the world's most complicated surgery, but there she stood, just watching her best friend operate; her best friend that she has missed despite him being right next to her most of the time at work and at Joe's.

Ever since the plane crash he and Lexie have been so focused on setting their relationship straight, which they have now achieved. But now she wants her best friend back, the best friend that teases her about having the hot wife, the best friend that gave her the daughter she longed for; however unconventional it happened, the best friend that she always has to give girl advice too, the best friend that no matter his age, he will never actually grow up.

That's why she's so content to just stand in the gallery and watch as his 3 million, or some stupid number, dollar hands work their magic. That is until the shrill shrieking of pagers pierces the still air of the OR and the content peace of the gallery. She grabs the offending item from the pocket of her lab coat, thinking it to just be some incompetent intern needing help on basic sutures, she flicked her line of vision to the flashing message displayed on the screen, doing something of a comical double take when she clearly read the message on the screen, she bolted out of the gallery as fast as she can, remembering the last time something like this happened, and she did not want to be alone.

She scrubbed in as fast as she could, before running into the OR to find Mark's confused face, he obviously didn't read the page, probably dismissed it for later, she met his eyes before speaking softly.

"Mark, they've called code black."

/\/\/\/\

The two lay together quietly, the only sounds in the room those of their heavy breathing, her red hair splayed across his chest as they tried to catch their breath. It wasn't the first time that one of them had pulled the other into the closest on-call room, nor was it the first time that they hadn't immediately gotten dressed after their activities and left the room like nothing had happened. They both knew that however this case ended, be it that she stay in Seattle or head back to LA, they both knew that they would never be able to quash the feelings that they had for each other. Their work, especially together, had improved to an even higher standard since that first night she was back in Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital, since that thought provoking talk outside of Kensi's room. In some ways, the lists of failed relationships the two had we're partially to blame for the hesitancy in heading into a relationship together, both believing that their failed marriages were signs that all relationships would end badly, because after all, who wanted to be with someone that was at fault for the failure of a marriage, possibly the biggest commitment of them all?

"What are we even doing, Addie?" the younger man asked, his fingers running up and down the bare skin of her arm, occasionally twisting themselves into the long tresses of her red hair.

"Honestly? I don't-" Addison began, stopping as both hers and Alex's pagers beeped in unison. Flipping over, she grabbed his and passed it over her shoulder before pulling her own from the stand beside the bed, hearing his gasp as her own eyes widened, both of them pulling the covers tighter to their bodies as they stared at each other in shock and fear, fumbling for their clothes at the same time. "Right now? Staying in here being as quiet as we can"

/\/\/\

"So you're a big important FBI Agent, huh?"

"Says the paediatric surgeon."

Laughing quietly as they talked, Emily pulled her knees to her chest, curling herself up in the comfortable chair of the attending's lounge. The many cuts that littered her body still stung with every move, but she tried to hide her winces as much as possible, not wanting to put a downer on her reunion with her friend, knowing that the perky blonde would put the pieces together immediately. It had been years since she had spoken to her best friends, and although her life had gone on relatively easily, now she was with them again she realised exactly how much she had missed them.

"Seriously, though. You look good, Ari," the brunette said honestly, still able to read the look in her friends eyes that gave away her happiness.

"You do too, Em, but don't think you're getting away with it that easy. That could be you up in one of those beds, Em. The FBI is a dangerous job," Arizona pointed out, not needing to specify that she was talking about the battered blonde and the pregnant brunette that lay in the beds on the floor above.

The fact that she could be the one battered and bruised was not something that Emily didn't already know, and it also wasn't something she liked to think about, especially knowing how she had felt with it being JJ, but she could understand where Arizona was coming from, even if she didn't like it. Yes, she knew that chasing serial killers across the country was a dangerous job; she'd been shot at enough times and taken enough of her own beatings to know that, but that wasn't the reason that she did her job. That wasn't the reason that she got up every morning and went to work to stare at death and evil all day.

"It is, and it's stressful sometimes but it's rewarding as hell, and that's why I do it. To be able to save even one person's life... that's enough for me to risk it," she admitted, not feeling the need to make a point of the method that she used to keep the horrors she saw in their compartmentalised boxes.

"Don't care so much it gets you killed, though, ok?" the blonde ordered softly, reaching over and squeezing her friend's knee lightly at the older woman's nod. "Good, so. Are you still sleeping your way around or is there someone I need to know about?" she asked bluntly, smirking at the blush that formed over Emily's cheeks.

"I, er... there's a guy. We're kind of a new thing, but... I have a feeling this one's going to last, you know?" Emily answered truthfully, her smile softening at the thought of Spencer, the man that had stayed by her beside for days on end when he had plenty of opportunities to leave and be with JJ instead; the member of their team that hadn't put themselves in the hospital. "What about you? You find yourself a hot girl yet?"

"I have a wife, actually. A wife and a little girl," Arizona told her, her own smile fading as she watched Emily's reaction to her words, mentally cursing when she realised where she had slipped up. "Oh, Em... do you want to talk about it?" she offered, continuing to mentally hit herself as Emily stayed silent.

"I just... I'm the only one of us that doesn't have the one thing we all wanted. We all wanted to have children and you both have one, but I went and messed up what was probably my only chance. I shouldn't have gotten an abortion, Arizona. I know I'd have been the laughing stock of the school but I shouldn't have ended my baby's life," the brunette murmured, her eyes fixed on the wall ahead as she remembered those few short weeks that she had carried a child inside of her; her child.

The women sat in silence as they thought over the changes that had happened during their lives, changes that they had been at each other's sides for, and both knew that despite the distance, they needed to keep in touch and go back to being each other's sounding boards. The attending's lounge was silent apart from the quiet murmur of voices outside, and Arizona and Emily were enjoying the peace that was soon ruined by the loud beeping of Arizona's pager.

Lifting her gaze from the wall, Emily looked over at her friend, watching as her calm face turned into one of panic briefly before it was masked, though her eyes were still wide. "Ari? What is it?"

"Uh... code black."

"Code black? Isn't that...?" Emily began, stopping at Arizona's short nod.

"Lockdown; Nobody leaves, nobody enters, and I am really hoping that this is not about to become what it did last time."

"Which was?"

Looking up at Emily, Arizona swallowed roughly and clipped her pager back to her belt, her mind on both the safety of Callie, Sofia and the rest of their friends, but also the memory of the last lockdown that had occurred in the hospital.

"Hell."

/\/\/\

"Don't you think Hotch is being a little mean to that nurse? We all want to know how Jayje is doing, and I understand that we've already nearly lost Em this month, but jeez."

Although neither team could disagree with the statement, most of them thinking exactly the same thing as they watched Hotch grill the nurse that stood behind the nurses' desk, they were slightly surprised as to who had said the words; the blonde analyst being the first person to have threatened the nurses previously for information on both JJ and Kensi. The two teams were crammed together almost uncomfortably in what seemed to be the smallest waiting room in the hospital, and despite their shared concern, the NCIS team especially as they thought of both women as family, they could not seem to agree on the best approach to finding out the information they wanted. While the NCIS team were prepared to, however reluctantly, sit back and wait until the nurses actually knew something before asking, the BAU team had an entirely different approach of simply standing at the nurses' desk and using every threat they could think of until one of the nurses broke and told them what they wanted to know.

"Agent Hotchner, I told you. When I know what is going on with Agent Jareau, you will know."

"Agent Jareau is an extremely important agent within the FBI, so when I request an update on her condition I'd like an update on her condition."

"Sir, I apologise, but I do not know anything about Miss Jareau-"

"Agent."

"I do not know anything about Agent Jareau's condition, sir, but when I do, you will, so please, take a seat and I will be over with information when there is some."

"Nurse Harper, would you like me to take it to your superiors that you are unable to do your job?"

As Hotch's threats grew gradually louder, loud enough that everyone in the waiting room, and probably those within a close distance, could hear it clearly, both teams found something that they could actually agree on; somebody needed to step in and move Hotch away from the nurses.

Rolling his eyes as almost every look was sent in his direction; Rossi stood and made his way over to Hotch and the nurse, nodding at the woman, who seemed to be getting more annoying by the minute, to go back to what she was doing.

"Aaron, stop it. Yelling at the nurses isn't going to get us any answers; you know that if we thought it would then we'd all be doing it. It's difficult, but you need to trust that they know what they're doing, and they'll talk to us when there's actually something to know," the elder man told him, ignoring his protests and all but pushing him back over to his seat. He opened his mouth to speak again, his movements and words halting as a wave of pagers beeping sounded across the floor, watching, along with the other occupants of the waiting room, as the concerned looks and whispers passed between the nurses and doctors on the floor.

"What the hell is going on?"

"Agent's, there has been a slight problem, so I'm going to ask you to stay in this room, and we'll be back with an update as soon as we know something," the nurse said as she rushed into the room, her eyes flicking quickly between her pager and the agents.

"Nurse Harper, what's going on?" Garcia asked worriedly, her eyes too flicking about the room and her hand grabbing onto Rossi's, her heart beating quickly as her mind instantly sent her to something being wrong with JJ.

"There's been a code black; this whole hospital is on lockdown."

/\/\/\

"On-call room. Now."

Barely manning to turn around before her arm was being tugged; April quickly put down the pen in her hand and allowed Jackson to pull her into the closest on-call room, sucking in a breath just before his lips all but slammed against hers. As much as she enjoyed their spontaneous encounters, there were some times, like that of the present, that she really didn't feel like skipping out on cases to lock herself in an on-call room. Dropping her hands to his chest she gently pushed him away from her, biting her kiss-swollen lips as she tried to catch her breath.

"Jackson... we can't keep doing this. There are people that need our help," she told him, her chest rising and falling with her quick breaths.

"There are more residents than us, I'm sure they can live with us gone for a little while," Jackson shot back, dropping his lips down to her neck and his hands to her hips, groaning when he was once again pushed away.

"We have patients, Jackson."

"We have time," he shot back, smirking knowingly as he easily pulled her scrub top over her head and threw it behind him.

"But-" April began to protest, groaning as Jackson once again attached his lips to her neck.

She knew that it was wrong; she knew that they both had patients waiting that were more important than locking themselves in an on-call room, but she also knew that he knew she could never resist him when he dragged her into an on-call room. Rolling her eyes at her inability to say no, April pushed her own hands underneath his scrub top and pushed it over his head, she too throwing it somewhere on the floor behind him.

"You can't resist me, Kepner. Admit it," Jackson bragged with a smirk as he pulled her away from the wall and gently pushed her onto the bed before climbing onto the bed above her. "You know it's true."

Huffing at the truth in his words, April leaned in and kissed him once more as her hands dropped to untie the tie on his scrub bottoms, both of them groaning and pulling apart as their pagers beeped in unison. "You've got to be kidding me."

Both attending's pulled their pagers from the belts of their scrubs and lifted them to view, their eyes meeting worriedly as they read the 'code black' that flashed in front of them.

"Jackson..."

"It might not be another one; we just need to stay quiet, ok? We survived this the first time and we'll get through whatever this is too. Lockdown doesn't mean guns."

/\/\/\/\

It was deathly silent in the former chief's office, the quiet that people say you could hear a pin drop in. The two doctors sat in silence, just reflecting on all that went wrong in their lives, their marriage in particular, reflecting on how something so great, could have gone so wrong.

Sure, he cheated on her and she aborted their baby, but throughout it all they never stopped loving each other anybody could see that. It was plain obvious. Their one problem too, was also plainly obvious, however it was plainly obvious to anyone but them, hell, it was even obvious to Mark Sloan, which had to mean something.

Minutes, or hours passed and still no words were spoken between the two. It was a battle of wills, of who would cave first and speak the first word since he paged her to his office, however both were as stubborn as the other, and they both knew that the other would not crack under the pressure.

That was until the sound of pagers going off pierced the air, cutting right through the tension like a ten blade does skin.

Both doctors rushed to check their pagers, watching as the others eyes grew wide upon reading the message, each being dragged back into a memory of the past.

For him, it was Iraq, the reminder of the guns, and the explosions, and the deaths, but most importantly the aftermath of his ordeal.

For her, it was the flashbacks of almost three years ago, the last time this code was called, of how her best friends' husband almost died, of the many other deaths that occurred that day.

They both stared at each other with wide panicked eyes as they both threw their pagers onto Owen's desk, both collapsing onto the sofa in his office, thoughts wavering to their friends, more like family and their reaction to the news. Leaving the pager message up on the desk which was still flashing, reading-

"Code black; hospital in lockdown"

/\/\/\/\

"You have a very strong daughter."

Smiling softly at her doctors first words, JJ nodded lightly and flicked her eyes towards her daughter on the other side of the room, knowing that she was listening even though she was pretending not to be. Riley had been by her side since the moment she had woken up, and despite her protests, had not actually left the room for anything other than to go to the bathroom, which she had only done reluctantly when she could not wait any longer.

"I do, and I know I'm lucky for it," she replied honestly, laughing quietly as she watched Riley roll her eyes playfully. Looking back up at Lexie, JJ crinkled her eyebrows when she saw the woman's faraway look, even her drugged up state not letting her forget how to read behaviour. "Do you have kids?"

"Unfortunately, no, I don't. I, er... I was in a plane crash five months ago, so... children aren't exactly something I can do right now," Lexie answered sadly, though she smiled over at the young girl sitting quietly in her mother's hospital room.

With her job she had seen many families come through and leave, but she could say with all honesty that she had never seen a mother-daughter relationship as close as the two blonde's in the room she was currently in. Riley had been by her mother's bedside since the second she had woken up and while she had been doing her checks of JJ she had heard snippets of their conversations; she had been close with her mother but even they had never had the close relationship that she could tell was between JJ and Riley.

"It seems like it's the year for tragedies then, huh?"

"Something like that, yeah."

Both women laughed quietly, thankful to be making light of their situations, knowing that too much seriousness would do nothing but drive them crazy; they needed to laugh or they would never be able to make it past what had happened to them.

"You really do have a strong daughter, though. She's handled all of this so much better than most other family members do," Lexie commented with a smile, watching as the young girl in question stood and moved to her mother's bedside, taking her hand and squeezing it gently.

"She's always handled stressful situations better than most people; she definitely handles them better than I do, so doc, how about you tell me what's wrong with me?" JJ agreed with a smile, adding on the question on the end in hopes that the doctor would pick up on the under meaning of the words.

"You sure you wanna know?" Lexie asked apprehensively.

"Of course, tell me doc" JJ smiled.

"Okay, so you had two broken legs, with our orthopaedic attending set straight. Six broken ribs, a punctured lung, ruptured spleen which had to be removed. Two broken wrists and one broken elbow, a broken ankle and a broken collar bone. Not to mention all of the internal bleeding you suffered and the cardiac tamponade which had to be cleared using a pericardiocentesis. Including all of the burn marks which our plastic surgeon cleared and with his expertise, his words not mine, they should leave minimum scarring. You had a number of whip marks, and you suffered extensive beatings," She stopped before looking over to Riley who was sitting by her mother, watching the two blondes nod to signal her to continue, "and you were raped over twenty times." Lexie said, her eyes falling downcast as she spoke those last words.

JJ's eyes flicked to the doctors lab coat pocket as she heard Lexie's pager beep loudly, not expecting the sound.

At first the doctor's reactions were nothing to be nervous about, her straight face stayed calm and her demeanour did not change, however as the seconds moved on, she watched worriedly as Lexie slowly began to lose her composure, her fear evident.

"What is it?"

"I, uh... nothing you need to worry about, I just need you to stay quiet, ok?"

"Oh, I think our little blonde Agent has everything to worry about, Doctor."

Looking up at the new, male voice in the room, all three occupants of the room gasped nervously when they saw the two men in the doorway of the hospital room, their guns pointedly directly at them.

"You didn't think you'd gotten out that easily, did you?" the first man sneered, stepping further into the room as the other man stood guard outside, both of their guns still held high.

"Riley, go and stand on the other side of the room with the doctor," JJ ordered, hiding her shaking hands as she nudged her daughter towards Lexie, holding back a scream as she watched the armed man grab her daughter's arm and pull her closer to him. "Don't you dare touch her"

"Now, now, Agent Jareau, is that any way to talk to me when I have a gun at your daughter's head?"

"I swear to god, you bastard, if you hurt her I will kill you."

"I wouldn't do that. The way we see it, you have two choices. One, you do as we say and your daughter lives, or two, you don't do as we say and your daughter meets the wrong end of a bullet. It's your choice, Agent."

* * *

**A/N: Well, that was the end guys. *me and Larissa run and hide*****  
**

**Larissa knows how much she is loved, so she is equally as responsible for this fic as I am. I couldn't have done this without her. Love you lots girl!**

**I love everyone that has reviewed throughout this story, everyone that has followed and favourited this, I love you all so much. And once again, we spent a lot of time and effort on this chapter, wanting to make it perfect, so please review. Even if it is a smiley face we would appreciate it greatly.**

**See you soon guys! **


	22. PLEASE READ

**A/N: Okay, this is just to tell you that the first chapter of the sequel, No More Sorrow has been published. It will not be listed under the normal archive, it will be listed underneath the Criminal Minds/Grey's Anatomy crossover. **

**Bye guys!**


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